Jude Atwood @JudeAtwood
Writer & cartoonist. Author of the spooky middle grade mystery "Maybe There Are Witches," available now from Regal House/Fitzroy. judeatwood.tv California Joined January 2018-
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If I had murdered someone and Columbo turned up as the detective I would simply not waste everyone’s time trying to get away with it, it’s clearly not going to happen, I would simply ask for a picture with Columbo and then go straight to jail
Happy birthday to John Waters and Machine Gun Kelly!
"Okay, guys--each of you gets to name an island after the most memorable birthday present you ever received."
"Okay, guys--each of you gets to name an island after the most memorable birthday present you ever received."
my business manager: okay, let’s take a look at your financial portfolio. me, someone who doesn’t know the meaning of the word financial or portfolio, holding a folder with hundreds of my drawings of bigfoot: okay, let’s do this
The secret to a successful relationship with a guy is that when you're criticizing him, you should try not to sound too much like his mom, but still sound a little bit like his mom.
STRANGER: *steps out of time machine* i come from the fewtch ME: the fewtch? STRANGER: yeah we call it the fewtch now
Read receipts terrify me. It's so hard to tell the difference between "I read your email and I'm waiting to answer it when I have time" and "I read your email and I'm hoping you'll just go away if I ignore you."
I’m not saying I know who Banksy is, I’m just saying we haven’t heard from Anne Geddes in a while.
All the people near me at the library where I’m working are taking part in this cool new trend where their phone rings multiple times at full volume and they just let it ring and ring and don’t make any move to silence it.
.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin
55K Followers 3K Following • goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •NurseBrianRN @rn_murse
19K Followers 823 Following Singer-Songscreamer I Gay Homosexual I Pubic Figure | Fourth ThingNot Today Eric @NotTodayEric
27K Followers 9K Following Gen X Superhero. Old people jokes for my old people followers. 90’s Kid Alumni. #cheeseburgersUnindicted President .. @PopeAwesomeXIII
13K Followers 2K Following Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration infoCynicalTherapist @CynicalTherapi1
15K Followers 8K Following LMFT-LADAC Addictions Expert, Not your therapist, both traumatized and trauma informed. Sometimes a writer https://t.co/Y7o1NsmtJh Bad words ftw. 🏳️🌈Village Person @SvnSxty
31K Followers 4K Following If you support ethnic cleansing, kindly fuck off 😊 Find me and follow me @SvnSxty on all platforms. my tweets ⤵️Boyd's Backyard™ @TheBoydP
102K Followers 20K Following I’d rather be working on my yard. #envydastrength I retweet regular people. My tweets are here: https://t.co/zOIJ18SHBVcap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname
11K Followers 2K Following slowly backing away. TOP TWEETS: https://t.co/K8oKqyuL84 click below for recent. I’m the same guy at the other places.Daveastated @Daveastated
7K Followers 1K Following Now I am become Dave, the destroyer of words. *Inventor of the flinglong* I only sleep to give my phone a breakjames. @fictionalwoes
11K Followers 8K Following — #원우 | to indeed be a god. | sff/horror pr manager. seventeen enjoyer, major in wonwoorideulism. 🏳️🌈@[email protected].. @JonBaker
14K Followers 11K Following Gamer, geek, Mensan, and lover of all things comedy. Creator of the webcomic Alarmingly Bad (@AlarminglyBad)Royotathon 🚘 @Royotathon
12K Followers 871 Following idiot. one time documentary subject. Métis. he/him https://t.co/wJiiuU7cAzIndy @IndecisiveJones
19K Followers 885 Following husband, father, animation aficionado, man trapped in the body of a penguin, pfp by @obscureaaronMarcmywords @Marcmywords2
55K Followers 50K Following Tweeting Live From The Capital Of The Who Dat Nation. https://t.co/92vEozoAvoVictoria_US_ @VictoriaUS31780
1 Followers 470 FollowingRoland of Gilead, Gun.. @RolandKaTetof19
312 Followers 400 Following Roland Deschain. Son of Steven. Lord of Ancient Lands. All things serve the Beam. Constant reader. Amateur photographer. Animal and nature lover. Gunslinger.Fearl_essFashio @essfashio4288
3 Followers 471 Followingmuthuku_mar51 @MMar5155608
31 Followers 865 Following Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.just Kev @KevSpengel
330 Followers 580 FollowingBen Barnett @SpudCheezWhiz
152 Followers 2K Following The fat imp himself. Lurker extraordinaire. Poster boy for imposter syndrome.Justin Perkins @J2thePerk
202 Followers 1K Following San Luis Rey River Valley, California. Speech and Debate coach. Fan of the Cloth. #FriarFaithfulaniKanth440 @AKanth44022139
7 Followers 791 Following Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.WhisperWhiz_ @WhisperW59859
23 Followers 268 FollowingEmily Mei @Channel18374541
3 Followers 538 FollowingDoc Johnny Fever🎙 @NikiMarinis
6K Followers 2K Following Weird Girl🔮Co-host of @LyricalCrimes podcast 🎤 Writer of dating & relationship comedy gold 💋📝 “You’re a Gen-X wet dream” - @MickeyBlowtorchSeptimus Brown @SeptimusBrown
83K Followers 64K Following Senior editor at the Darling Axe. Award-winning short-fiction writer. Chaotic good. He/they.Booktips @Booktipservices
42K Followers 42K Following Here is where your book project evolves. 🚀📘 Check out our #Editing #CoverDesigning and #Reviewing services for a better writing journey.Independent Press Awa.. @GabbyBookAwards
12K Followers 12K Following Helping authors cut through the clutter by recognizing excellence. SPRING: Independent Press Award FALL: New York City Big Book Award: All publishers+authorsFoodie_airy @AiryFoodie60991
26 Followers 2K FollowingAspen @Aspen647034
34 Followers 658 FollowingABDecker @decker_ab
3K Followers 3K Following Devonshire lad in exile, #author of The Dark Frontier, https://t.co/mxrzbXCmen and Flowers from the Black Sea https://t.co/k5asupCuOO. https://t.co/vPoJdvDfrlRichard Hill @Richard78528576
110 Followers 536 FollowingGabino Iglesias @Gabino_Iglesias
45K Followers 18K Following Writer/reader/speaker/music lover/book reviewer/freelancer/photographer/PhD/New York Times horror columnist. HOUSE OF BONE AND RAIN is up for preorder! 🇵🇷Lepresean|CR: HOUSE O.. @HighhFantasy
1K Followers 2K Following He/Him father of 3, fantasy/sci-fi/horror lover, stuck in the 90’s, movie buff, stoner, autistic, bipolar. “Be curious, not judgmental.” -Ted LassoDoan Phuong Nguyen (s.. @Zoe1416
502 Followers 603 Following Middle Grade Author of MÈO AND BÉ and A TWO-PLACED HEART (Sept. 2024). VCFA WCYA MFA. Creative Girly Girl. Lover of shih tzus, cats, good books.Marta Maletz @Marta_Maletz
421 Followers 1K Following Brooklyn Mother, Broker, Lover of babies, puppies, music & a good deal. Cali girl at heart.Midland Authors @midlandauthors
2K Followers 1K Following The Society of Midland Authors, founded 1915, includes authors from 12 Midwestern states. We present public events and annual literary awards.Sarah Rider-Amin @sarahrider
313 Followers 1K FollowingSteve @RedSox_Huskies
590 Followers 1K Following Mostly Red Sox and UConn with some poker and left wing politics mixed in.sandarcon🟧 @sandarcon
957 Followers 5K Following Generations of my family's dreams became glorious reality in game 7. Pitchers and catchers report 2/11. Miss you Michael, as ever and always.Mist @Mist1826457
8 Followers 872 FollowingCrafty Beerch @Dniela_la_la_la
536 Followers 3K Following Welcome to my space, please DO leave on your shoes... #ActuallyAutistic #ADHD #AuDHDRobin @wigglesandreams
28 Followers 180 Following A layer of sociology over a lot of television nerdiness. Writing, baking, WOC. Queer Chicane, they/them 🏳️🌈💜🌞💜🏳️🌈Melody in Retroshade @DoMyReelTurn
194 Followers 1K FollowingWhat Idiot @What_Idiot_
974 Followers 358 Following One Joke. 🔥 Likes/RT's Fridays but DM (or tag in replies) if you can't wait! 🔥Woman Lingo @WomanLingo
269 Followers 2K Following Truth 2024 🦅 | #Blackfish 🎬 | #StandWithIsrael 🇮🇱 On a breakBecci @twoseaswitheye
74 Followers 377 FollowingJen-Xtra @jenjamn515
1K Followers 2K Following Came for the political activism; stayed for the reality TV. Can't stand posts that tell me to let that sink in. I like foodie twitter too. Roevember is coming.Tassoula @tassoula
3K Followers 3K Following Writer | Communications Director for Julian Lennon | U2 X-Radio Host - SiriusXM | Voice Talent | Insomniac | Tweets are my own.Rob Cornelius @BentleyTock
2K Followers 2K Following President of Marketing, The Pac West Group @bentleytock.bsky.social https://t.co/rTo8DbCicZ #ltmjrbentley 🐶aaa @xaaafunaaax
5K Followers 5K Following DM is closed if looking for a relationship. Please enjoy the journey in life.Nesitethou @nesitethou30665
22 Followers 2K FollowingRipley Trout @RipleyTrout
296 Followers 2K Following Lives near the deep ocean but can be found paddling in the shallow waters.D.N. Schmidt, space o.. @Writepop
10K Followers 7K Following Science fiction writer, humorist, and brain in a jar. Grab my books at Amazon! Read free stories, jokes, and writing tips at https://t.co/PmeQokhNBo.little grey mouse �.. @mouse_math
3K Followers 4K Following just a mouse with some imaginary friends. we like natural science, abstract math, ancient history, and stuff.Danielle Legge/Danie .. @Danieleona144
321 Followers 128 Following I really like to laugh, I'm very passionate about things I believe in (hobbies)comedy art,movie making,&following elons smarts. Be happy x 2024 👑🍀😆 💕Lady Lily 🌷📚�.. @LadyLily_Writer
643 Followers 547 Following Self-published author of 7 novels. Award winning author - I once won a contest for World's Smallest Carved Pumpkin 🎃. I was 11. It was tiny.Francis Ashton 💙�.. @FrancisAshton1
201 Followers 763 FollowingAudrey_Lewis @AudreyLewi82167
2 Followers 43 FollowingAnnette "she was robb.. @roseknittingco
350 Followers 4K Following Were you silent or were silenced?Sydney Dunlap @SydneyDunlap16
2K Followers 2K Following SCBWI member, animal lover, anti-trafficking advocate. Award-winning author of IT HAPPENED ON SATURDAY and RACING THE CLOUDS (Jolly Fish '25). Rep: @annmrose.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin
55K Followers 3K Following • goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •NurseBrianRN @rn_murse
19K Followers 823 Following Singer-Songscreamer I Gay Homosexual I Pubic Figure | Fourth ThingNot Today Eric @NotTodayEric
27K Followers 9K Following Gen X Superhero. Old people jokes for my old people followers. 90’s Kid Alumni. #cheeseburgersUnindicted President .. @PopeAwesomeXIII
13K Followers 2K Following Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration infoCynicalTherapist @CynicalTherapi1
15K Followers 8K Following LMFT-LADAC Addictions Expert, Not your therapist, both traumatized and trauma informed. Sometimes a writer https://t.co/Y7o1NsmtJh Bad words ftw. 🏳️🌈Village Person @SvnSxty
31K Followers 4K Following If you support ethnic cleansing, kindly fuck off 😊 Find me and follow me @SvnSxty on all platforms. my tweets ⤵️Boyd's Backyard™ @TheBoydP
102K Followers 20K Following I’d rather be working on my yard. #envydastrength I retweet regular people. My tweets are here: https://t.co/zOIJ18SHBVcap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname
11K Followers 2K Following slowly backing away. TOP TWEETS: https://t.co/K8oKqyuL84 click below for recent. I’m the same guy at the other places.Daveastated @Daveastated
7K Followers 1K Following Now I am become Dave, the destroyer of words. *Inventor of the flinglong* I only sleep to give my phone a breakjames. @fictionalwoes
11K Followers 8K Following — #원우 | to indeed be a god. | sff/horror pr manager. seventeen enjoyer, major in wonwoorideulism. 🏳️🌈@[email protected].. @JonBaker
14K Followers 11K Following Gamer, geek, Mensan, and lover of all things comedy. Creator of the webcomic Alarmingly Bad (@AlarminglyBad)Royotathon 🚘 @Royotathon
12K Followers 871 Following idiot. one time documentary subject. Métis. he/him https://t.co/wJiiuU7cAzIndy @IndecisiveJones
19K Followers 885 Following husband, father, animation aficionado, man trapped in the body of a penguin, pfp by @obscureaaronMarcmywords @Marcmywords2
55K Followers 50K Following Tweeting Live From The Capital Of The Who Dat Nation. https://t.co/92vEozoAvoAAVEface @devilwgoodies
1K Followers 2K Following I only eat popcorn at the movies. Founder at LadyFair cigarettes.Lindsay @Rollinintheseat
16K Followers 4K Following Hi, I'm Lindsay. I use a wheelchair to get around most of the time. Most of my tweets are about life from the sitting down perspective.D.N. Schmidt, space o.. @Writepop
10K Followers 7K Following Science fiction writer, humorist, and brain in a jar. Grab my books at Amazon! Read free stories, jokes, and writing tips at https://t.co/PmeQokhNBo.Ponytail N. Glasses @ponyglasses
319 Followers 176 Following Thoughts from my ponytail. Follow me on Instagram @ponyglassesRoland of Gilead, Gun.. @RolandKaTetof19
312 Followers 400 Following Roland Deschain. Son of Steven. Lord of Ancient Lands. All things serve the Beam. Constant reader. Amateur photographer. Animal and nature lover. Gunslinger.ABDecker @decker_ab
3K Followers 3K Following Devonshire lad in exile, #author of The Dark Frontier, https://t.co/mxrzbXCmen and Flowers from the Black Sea https://t.co/k5asupCuOO. https://t.co/vPoJdvDfrlGabino Iglesias @Gabino_Iglesias
45K Followers 18K Following Writer/reader/speaker/music lover/book reviewer/freelancer/photographer/PhD/New York Times horror columnist. HOUSE OF BONE AND RAIN is up for preorder! 🇵🇷Carol Saller @SubvCopyEd
15K Followers 1K Following Author of children's books MADDIE'S GHOST, EDDIE'S WAR, and THE BRIDGE DANCERS. Contributing editor, CHICAGO MANUAL OF STYLE.Rick Telander @ricktelander
7K Followers 392 Following Chicago Sun-Times sports columnist; SLAM Basketball EvangelistDoan Phuong Nguyen (s.. @Zoe1416
502 Followers 603 Following Middle Grade Author of MÈO AND BÉ and A TWO-PLACED HEART (Sept. 2024). VCFA WCYA MFA. Creative Girly Girl. Lover of shih tzus, cats, good books.Jed Wagman @JedWagman
2K Followers 2K Following I don’t know what to put here. I do film stuff and like motion picturesMidland Authors @midlandauthors
2K Followers 1K Following The Society of Midland Authors, founded 1915, includes authors from 12 Midwestern states. We present public events and annual literary awards.What Idiot @What_Idiot_
974 Followers 358 Following One Joke. 🔥 Likes/RT's Fridays but DM (or tag in replies) if you can't wait! 🔥unmehlievable @unmehlievable
3K Followers 2K Following Parody of a parody | Crocodile Wrangler |Chocolate Cage Fighter | Compulsive Liar | 🇬🇧Laurie Beth Schneider @Gittelsgirl
766 Followers 2K Following Heron spotter. Kidlit nerd. Photographer. Debut novel, GITTEL, coming April 1, 2025 from @Regalhouse1. 📷🐦📚🕎☮☕🇺🇦🌻L'hornert (pretend it.. @LHornerT
569 Followers 1K Following Preorder: "Horsemouth and Aquariumhead:" https://t.co/6QJVNnh0y9 Poetry: The Tales of Flaxie Char @dancinggrlpress.Leah Angstman: Buy FA.. @leahangstman
3K Followers 1K Following DWHL hockey winger. 🏒 Avs fangirl. Author of 3 books, most recently FALCON IN THE DIVE @RegalHouse1 & SHOOT THE HORSES FIRST @KernpunktPress. Ed: @AltCurrent.Hope Bolinger- WHY TH.. @HopeBolinger
4K Followers 2K Following Acquisitions Editor @endgamepress, Author: almost 30 books under contractSydney Dunlap @SydneyDunlap16
2K Followers 2K Following SCBWI member, animal lover, anti-trafficking advocate. Award-winning author of IT HAPPENED ON SATURDAY and RACING THE CLOUDS (Jolly Fish '25). Rep: @annmroseErin (parody) @thisoneiserin
2K Followers 659 Following Content: 📚 Romance novels ⚖️ Law 🏔️ Alaska ⛸ Figure skating 🎖 The ArmyWords of a Paige 📚.. @_WordsOfAPaige
2K Followers 1K Following Book Blogger 📚 | SFF & Horror 🚀💀 | Gamer 🎮 | Contributing blogger to https://t.co/lMMhJcckLL | [email protected] 📧Ivana Knapp @Ivana_Knapp
11K Followers 5K Following Well-tolerated kook. Selectively social & enjoying a quasi-hermit lifestyle. https://t.co/XgizCfKTOLTaco Biscuits @bgschnikelfritz
6K Followers 1K Following What’s the scuttlebutt? Seen on HuffPost https://t.co/hkCIhZOvybMark Allan Gunnells @MarkAGunnells
2K Followers 2K FollowingD.S. Allen (PREORDER .. @dsallenwrites
2K Followers 2K Following (she/her) Wife, mother, and writer of middle grade | #MGnarwhals | rep @esc_key | The Skeleton Flute (Aladdin '24) | https://t.co/TzRx5GNFFYM.R. Fournet @mr_fournet
101 Followers 143 Following Artist, dancer, autism mom and author of the middle grade horror novel, Brick Dust and Bones. Published with Feiwel and Friends. Repped by Handpsun Lit.octopus/caveman @octopuscaveman2
254 Followers 144 FollowingMarisca Pichette (she.. @MariscaPichette
1K Followers 607 Following makes things 🏳️🌈 / RIVERS IN YOUR SKIN, SIRENS IN YOUR HAIR (@press_android April '23) / Rep: @askamycollins / Stonecoast MFA '21 / HWA & SFWA 🐉Rebecca Weber🖌️�.. @RWeberWrites
36K Followers 30K Following 📚SCBWI Author - THE PAINTER'S BUTTERFLY (@ArtemesiaGeoff)/Beta reader/@litkidsmagazine founder/🏠 flipper/Bostie & girl mom/#MGpies #YANationAlly Ally Oxenfree @AllyMalinenko
6K Followers 2K Following She/her 🏳️🌈 @horrorwriters #SpookyMG rep: Rena Rossner. GHOST GIRL, Stoker Finalist THIS APPEARING HOUSE, THE OTHER MARCH SISTERS (25) BROKEN DOLLS (25)the saddest girl to e.. @lifeisterrible
2K Followers 1K Following Big boobs✨Broken brain (I AM 42 YEARS OLD)Nick S. @baba_shook
49 Followers 355 Following he/him | 🏳️🌈 | book stuff, cat stuff, nerd stuff, queer stuffRoss Montgomery @mossmontmomery
7K Followers 1K Following Costa shortlisted kids author. 'Refreshingly untethered by logic' - Kirkus. SPELLSTONE out now! (@walkerbooksuk) Repd @cmlwilsonStephen Leuchtman �.. @leuchtman
2K Followers 2K Following Single dad, writer, political junkie, Director of polling PRG. Tweets are my own. 8w7 ENFP. Since pronouns pissed people off Enneagram and Myer Briggs will tooB. Ware @BWareAuthor
8K Followers 9K Following Author of middle grade. Passionate about being a mum, writing, and quiche. WARNING: Magic Can Be Dangerous! on sale April 30th 2024 - @CranthorpeBooks.Jorie Graham @jorie_graham
12K Followers 7K Following Pulitzer Prize in Poetry. “To 2040” now out from @coppercanyonprs and @carcanetStephanie Cowell @StephanieCowell
2K Followers 2K Following historical novelist: coming 2023 THE BOY IN THE RAIN, love story of two men in Edwardian England. Recipient American Book Award. Author Claude & Camille, etc.Silvia Moreno-Garcia @silviamg
28K Followers 1 Following Author. Not active nor checking messages via this platform, find me at: https://t.co/MHd2DepfxqFleur Bradley @FTBradleyAuthor
12K Followers 10K Following Writes mysteries, loves cats, Dutch. Books: Daybreak on Raven Island, Midnight at the Barclay Hotel (Viking). #SCBWI #MWA #HWA #SinC. Agent: @LaurelSymondsDisgruntled Haradrim @pdjeliclark
12K Followers 3K Following Historian. Writer. Habitual Tweet Rate Limit Exceeder. Jumbie & Duppy Conqueror. Rambler of Things. Doer of Stuff. Find me at THREADS: @pdjeliclarkGordon korman @gordonkorman
9K Followers 609 Following Gordon Korman is the author of more than 100 books for kids and teens.Amanda Loren @pi3sugarpi3
1K Followers 618 Following Currently writing a book about bridges to the past. Married to a sexy yeti, mom who cusses. she/her. Cycle-breaker. ❤️❤️ Wholesome AF ❤️❤️ You matter.Houston Hard Hitters @TXRednation01
2K Followers 4K Following Slime SZN #WeAreTexans #Ready2Reign Rockets Astros 2022 2017 World Champs Longhorns Humor Horror Military Boxing MMA AEW WWEDave Weasel @DaveWeasel
501K Followers 17K Following 5x Billboard comedy chart topper. IG: daveweasel @valleyboyspod "verified since September 2016" don't come at meAirport security line cutters are target of first-in-the-nation California bill ow.ly/S4Sh105qeS3
@JudeAtwood Freud would be very interested in you. 😉
Have you tried eating yogurt with a fork? I have (Me flirting)
@TalkerReel92 @AbdulrahmanUgas She’s been brilliant since she was 11
@amirdelson sorry but this is a terrible demo of your product - Elon sounds really boring in this resume.
@veenadubal Separation of church and state is a thing for a reason
What if you woke up tomorrow with only the things you were grateful for today.
My Southern charms include adding mayo and pickle relish to every “salad” recipe.
I always fear that oneday I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet
no one: me at 2am: maybe cake in the fridge also can’t sleep cause it’s thinking about me
~...Our SOULS Are Truly In LOVE 🍂💜 LOVE Isn't Planned It HAPPENS 🍂💜 It's A Beautiful Painful "MAGIC" For Lifetime 🍂💜 We're Slaves To Each Other & IT'S PEACEFUL 🍂💜💜🍂 To LIVE In Feeling LOVE To Feel ALIVE Again...~
Barnes & Noble is having a members 25% off all pre-orders from April 17-19! If you're interested in pre-ordering any of my upcoming books, now's the time! Links to individual books in comments. Shares/RTs appreciated! #BNPreorder #kidlit @BNBuzz
@JudeAtwood @KitchenAidUSA The one I got my mother said “refurbished” on the box. I know she noticed but said nothing. But it was a smart decision!