Facebook is probably going to use its first & middle names because it’s become such a whore
What is wrong with kids these days...... sometimes I feel like I'm texting to a wall.
I thought I missed the rapture but turns out it’s just @Facebook is down.
With Facebook down how will I ever know which of my friends won’t get the vaccine #?
Snuck one in on me. I used to get the clap every year…. that’s how I knew the McRib was coming back
I just pulled a hair out of my right nostril that felt like it was attached to the left side of my brain
Dog The Bounty Hunter says he thought he had a pass to use the “N-Word” dude you’re racist & you should’ve kept that “inward”
Limited reading material at the doctor's office so I picked up a magazine that said.... HOW TO FIND THE G-SPOT pg. 34-36 continued on 128, 130-133. Damn it Cosmo..... why do you have to make it so hard to find?
No time for that…. I’m busy fighting on the internet
I appreciate you all wearing a mask when taking a selfie….
There are plenty of new job openings out there it’s just no one wants to flip burgers or be a conservative talk show host.
If you just believe, everything is popsicle
Officially pulled my name from consideration for the host of Jeopardy
There’s just too many words on Twitter…. I’m waiting for the movie
Maybe Britney’s dad was right all along…
I’m glad I wasn’t born with whatever bone it is that makes white people call their Jeeps “rigs”
I’m not saying the person that put out the Chicago Cubs updated top 30 prospects list is lazy but they did just list names of guys filling in holes since they traded everyone away
Wait who’s being misogynistic…. the guy picking low hanging fruit fro 2 current events or the guy assuming only women have OnlyFans/ are servers?
Luckily my only fans page is just me crying & eating cool ranch Doritos.
@Jake_Vig I saw Lenny Kravitz open for Tom Petty at Market Square Arena
I was just using OnlyFans to get interior decorating ideas, anyway.
Think I put my dick in the wrong one again….
My chiropractor murmurs things to me like “atta girl” and “easy” and I’m starting to suspect I’m a horse.
With OnlyFans getting rid of sexual content I’ll be forced to start sending dick pics on Facebook messenger again.
@Variety People actually listen to podcasts….. either way good catch there podcast listener person
I’m actually glad OnlyFans is banning sexual content….. maybe now we’ll have servers when I go out to eat.
I don’t know if I can be charged with child abuse or not but… I raised a Cubs fan & yesterday my 9yo asked if they were mathematically eliminated from the playoffs