Rum & Rocks @rumandrocks
Dig deeper... twitter.com/search?q=from%… Great Canadian Shield Joined May 2013-
Tweets42K
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Followers5K
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Following4K
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Likes79K
My black belt cost me, and earned me, a sense of humility at the same time. It’s part of me. I’ll never forget it.
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Rum & Rocks retweeted
I always have a plan B but it’s really just my plan A but dumber
Rum & Rocks retweeted
I'm not dead. Let's have dinner.
Prolly best to post shit that no one really cares about.
Do NOT let the low-carb person decide how much rice to get with your Chinese food.
Friday night drinks. Friday night songs. Welcome back weekend.
You know you waited too long when you finally get to go and the toilet flushes itself.
Rum & Rocks retweeted
SPOILER ALERT ~ In the new Mission: Impossible movie Tom Cruise runs and jumps a lot.
Rum & Rocks retweeted
don’t live in the wreckage of the past
Turns out that the 3rd 100 proof drink is when the tweets come out. Or so I’m told. 😇
Rum & Rocks retweeted
I bet Pavlov’s hair was soft because he conditioned it
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that wasn’t an earthquake, that was me masturbating
Earth already receives about the same energy from the Sun in an hour than humanity consumes in a year. Solar panels just need to catch a tiny amount of it to power our entire civilization!
You have to let it breathe for a few minutes
Shout out to my brother who arrived at our parents’ house first and bravely tracked down the wifi info for the rest of us
If the birds are stuck together they're probably velcrows
I found my Christmas Spirit .... It's been on aisle 2 at this liquor store the whole time.
Welcome to your 40’s: you’re not dying it’s just Thursday.
Whenever I go down the stairs next to an escalator, I always move faster than the escalator to prove to the people I made the better decision.
I always have a plan B but it’s really just my plan A but dumber
When you hear someone using your driveway to turn around
They better not reboot Back to the Future with a cybertruck
Hollandaise sauce is just mayonnaise that did a semester abroad.
I'm not dead. Let's have dinner.
80% of adulting is unsubscribing from emails and breaking down Amazon boxes.
If you don’t want to know… DON’T ZOOM IN!!!!
I’d sleep, but I’m not very good at it.
I’m no quitter I make sure I stick around long enough to be able to call it a regret
Dating in your 50s is like trying to find a shopping cart with good wheels.
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