Dylan Joseph Miller @AlwaysDylan

::Feeling nauseous now, like I'm going to vomit, sweating.:: Oh My God, what the hell is wrong with me? ::Heading back to the apartment::

*Out running, my mind racing, thinking about @shifterLeah. Stopped dead in my tracks, feeling a strong chest pain, like a heart attack*

@ShifterLeah ::not wanting to leave you yet, I curl up sitting against the wall and slowly drift back to sleep as I watch you sleep::

@ShifterLeah :Opens my eyes, still holding you on the couch, can't believe how warm you are. Carrying you to your room and laying you down:

@ShifterLeah ::Smiles as you calm me down, letting you cuddle up to me as we watch the movie, feeling at peace for the moment::

@ShifterLeah ::Looking back into your eyes:: and that doesn't freak you out? Make your mind wonder what the hell is your heart thinking?

@ShifterLeah ::Surprised, not sure what to say:: How you feel about me? ::trying to shake the confusion:: so it's not just me feeling this?

@ShifterLeah ::Looks at you with a puzzled look:: Seriously? Le, did you not hear me? I killed a man.... With my bare hands.

@ShifterLeah and hurt you. I don't want to do that. ::holding back how I really feel about you:: I care about you already.

@ShifterLeah ::Still not able to get rid of the lump in my throat:: I'm sorry Le, I know it's a lot to take in. I'm scared I'm gonna snap...

@ShifterLeah ::opening my eyes, looking back at yours:: I wish I could believe you. No matter how many good things I do, I still see them...

@ShifterLeah I'm a monster.

@ShifterLeah ::closes my eyes, looking down, still speaking quietly:: How do you know? We've...... We've just met. And now you know I'm.....

@ShifterLeah ::seeing your facing, turning with my back to you whispering:: I told you it was dark. I'm sorry.

@ShifterLeah ::getting angry:: He begged for mercy, and I killed him, slowly. I tortured him. And now..... Now I can't... ::breaking down::

@ShifterLeah ::Breathing deeply. Clenching my jaw:: I snapped, and I killed him. ::Looking into your eyes deeply:: With my bare hands.

@ShifterLeah ::fighting back the emotions:: She was murdered. He forced her to watch him kill my daughter and then rapped and killed her.

@ShifterLeah ::Gulping down another lump:: to an amazing woman. She had our first child when I was over seas. ::Pausing for a moment....

@ShifterLeah ::Pulls back, tears in my eyes:: There's more. ::Pulls out my dog tags with two wedding rings on the chain:: I was married...

@ShifterLeah ::Getting a lump in my throat:: pregnant women. They aunt me Le. I see their faces. I hear their cries. ::Stopping::