KRBTGT @AustinStratton9
#1 Kerberos Fan | Perpetually has a Golden Ticket | Bisexual Rapscallion | M:TG Judge | Keeper of Ferrets |🔑@h3kati3🔑 Key Distribution Center Joined February 2020-
Tweets2K
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Followers58
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Following67
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Likes864
Wife cooked me fresh eggs, and we opened up some pokemon cards. What a hype morning.
Keys, phone, smokes, wallet (uh?) Fit check for my errand run era.
You sent that insane email, and while I found it mostly funny, I did what you asked. I left you alone. I didnt even talk about you. For whatever fucking reason, obsession probably, you escalated. But see, you tried to come after my babies. You are not going to like what's next
Thank you to the wonderful officers of the Fort Worth Animal Control who performed a welfare check on our babies today. They were satisfied with their habitat, physical appearance, multiple access points to their food and water, bedding, climate control etc.
Finally all caught up on mortgage, car note, credit cards, etc. It took almost a year after being unemployed for so long but what a relief! No more arrears!
And for the record, i'm going to continue to say whatever the fuck I want, whenever I want, to whomever I want and theres fuck all you can do about it. How tf am I gonna be scared of someone who cried like a toddler on the floor when their fatass cratered a Secret Labs chair?
Anyone got the ICD-10 codes for being obsessed, and being unable to shut the fuck up? Asking for a... friend. Also, the DSM needs to be updated, it's missing the entry for being a constantly unemployed loser who needs everything handed to them.
I have never in my life received a more unhinged email than today. Two things: Defamation requires statments to be untrue. "what I will do to you, your family, your home, your stability and everything you hold dear." is a threat. Shut up, go away.
Emailing someone who's blocked you everywhere reeks of desperation. I'd rather be 'bitch-made' than the whole bitch. I may have my issues, but at least I can actually be a provider instead of a parasite.
Get you a wife that'll whip up a bacon egg and cheese bagel at 1am foe you and you'll know true happiness.
Coworker: "Don't ask me, I'm a mushroom. I'm kept in the dark and fed bullshit." fucking brilliant.
lmfao holy shit South Park, relax. 🤣
lmfao holy shit South Park, relax. 🤣
I guess the new hot scam is "auto accident compensation." At least it's more exciting than solar sales and car warranties.
$safetyNet = "safety net" $trampoline = "trampoline" $times = 4 $pieces = [REDACTED] function Tell-Story { param ( [string]$net, [string]$bounce, [int]$count, [string]$fragments ) } Tell-Story.(used) { -=$pieces }
Losing two best friends a week apart sure was an experience.
I just... can't believe it. Worst days of my life and yet I'm back at work, like I have to be. Despite the sadness, the sun will continue to rise. But god damn it all does it hurt.

Daily Ferrets @LadFerret
1K Followers 858 Following Daily ferret posts of a loving family of ferrets who require lots of love and treats ❤️
Tearseigh @Tearseighqrn
39 Followers 4K Following Don't panic, the moon is also lost somewhere in the ocean.
Ian Smith @m3lliv0ra
8 Followers 237 Following
PhoebeMay @38V31FWDRunVmh
55 Followers 6K Following
EdenScripps @4a0N6DRoQX26USC
66 Followers 7K Following
Thoupheet @thoupheet2801
107 Followers 3K Following
MieshaBeverley @MieshaBeve31053
42 Followers 2K Following
Johnny Mindless @mindlessjohnny
62 Followers 107 Following 18+ | Being mindless isn’t a personality, it’s a f*cking lifestyle. | 💜 @kxheart | #BYMB | IDIC | He/Him | Cis | https://t.co/cPi1WOh3tn
Sokratis @sokratissz
63 Followers 1K Following
Christian Schulz @CS217_
82 Followers 2K Following
Marc-André Moreau @awakecoding
5K Followers 2K Following Remote desktop protocol expert, OSS contributor and Microsoft MVP. I love designing products with Rust, C# and PowerShell. Proud to be CTO at Devolutions. 🇨🇦
Happy Camper Trading @HappyCamper140
178 Followers 2K Following Professional Bald Trader, Investing📈🧬Antropology Investor🗺 Futbol Connoisseur⚽️, Colombian🇨🇴 & Canadian🇨🇦
self-aware idiot @subparse
238 Followers 2K Following Em • 30 • golem of sadness • born 2 feed • xbox gt: subparse • battlenet: pisces • that one mercy that save u in OT • ♓
Elizabeth Bierbach @LizBierbach
173 Followers 2K Following Wife, mamma, student, proud believer in Facts, Science, Democracy & other remnants of a bygone era. Fan of Dogs, MotoGP, F1, Hockey, SciFi, Books & Crochet.
Iosif Peterfi 🇷�... @IosifPeterfi
660 Followers 2K Following Ethernity CLOUD Founder & CEO | Geek | Entrepreneur | Innovator | Opinions expressed are solely my own and do not express the view or opinions of MPG | #bitcoin
Dave Shanahan @Dav3Shanahan
1K Followers 3K Following ADHD "Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to god." #Microsoft #HipHop fan. sarcastic, but FAFO 2A all day. DavidVanDamage on Xbox PC. My father=vet
Gray | Judge Dad @JudgeGray18
52 Followers 124 Following MTG Level 2 Judge @CMDRSealed '22 '23 '24 Judge Team Community builder @TL_Reborn rules and policy manager
TheDuck @RowdyChildren
411 Followers 442 Following Ghostbuster @Microsoft. Network Team Lead @Dreamhack Festivals in NA. My words not @Microsoft or @Dreamhack. #PatchYourShit He/Him
Jeremy Sinclair #ฺN... @sinclairinat0r
11K Followers 7K Following #BlackTechTwitter's anime obsessed, #ADHD cursed, super enthusiastic .NET Dev #WindowsInsider #WIMVP, #WinDevMVP, #AvaloniaMVP #WindowsOnArm @dotnetfdn member
Samuel Henry @Samuelhenry610
22 Followers 152 Following Imma bad influence to myself 🖐 So don’t get it twisted 🤞
Raúl León @rleon_mx
6K Followers 5K Following Cybersecurity Specialist/ InfoSec Rockstar / Business Intelligence / AML / Co-host Podcast “Pláticas de Ciberseguridad” / Tweets are on my own. 🇲🇽
Ben @bentrix22
46 Followers 638 Following Electronics Engineer, I do Active Directory, Azure and IAM.
Juan Carlos Vázquez ... @jc_vazquez
5K Followers 6K Following IT & Security Professional | #InfoSec #cybersecurity 🛡 | Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference 
Eric Woodruff | MVP |... @ericonidentity
2K Followers 712 Following Security researcher @SemperisTech. Microsoft Security MVP, Entra nerd. Part-time hiker, full-time dad and partner. Opinions expressed are from my cat.
@deweyritten@infosec.... @DeweyRitten
2K Followers 626 Following Dormant account: I've migrated to https://t.co/z2e4KnHGSR.
Sean McGovern @410sean
123 Followers 533 Following Identity domain architect | he/him | the wise eternal judge who sits on high - the good place
foo... @foobarmuh
11 Followers 594 Following
Glenn @g_colville
171 Followers 1K Following
Gonçalo "GMan" Magal... @xGManPT
58 Followers 623 Following Não faço ideia como é que isto funciona.
Chad W. 🚀 🪐💙... @ChadWst
2K Followers 5K Following IT Pro, #Identity nerd - GenX’er who’s loves talking Tech, Security, Sports, Science, Music, golf, poker, Fitness- @Commanders @mets @canes @goheels #UAPs 🛸
Graeme B @GraemeCE
366 Followers 300 Following @Microsoft CSA in Security. Opinions are my own. Mastodon - @[email protected] BSky: https://t.co/yuQFgV49ya I help run https://t.co/AmhaN2Iywy
TPO! @ MM'25 @TPOCharlemagne
266 Followers 602 Following Fighting game player DATA|TPO! Charlemagne. Overthinker, music lover and foodie. Follow me @ https://t.co/kIPCKITtoA!
Steph | Available for... @velociraptisart
175 Followers 678 Following Background Painter 🌱 | Looking for work in TV Animation Contact: [email protected]
Pagefile @Pagefile0x00
41 Followers 140 Following Hobbyist game developer and photographer. 日本語をときどき勉強します
Sentient p0tate @sentient_p0tate
26 Followers 524 Following CyberSec awesomeness | making my way through cyber like a potato shaped sponge | views my own
tramainedarius @ReaLentLess79
419 Followers 6K Following
Dan Taylor @DeltaTangoTwo
881 Followers 2K Following msft's ghost team, Tiramisu expert, used to be technical, Dad x5, former Marine
Alyssa (she/her) @ramen0x3f
3K Followers 574 Following @ramen0x3f.bsky.social Senior Threat Researcher and Pun Aficionado @Microsoft Former research+red team+hand drawn memes @Mandiant
William Turton @WilliamTurton
30K Followers 5K Following Reporter @ProPublica Contact me on Signal using a non-work device: 804-295-7201 [email protected]
Jolly Medic @FikeClub
17 Followers 445 Following Lover of Engineering, Professional Tech Shaman, and 3D Print Magician.
Wynell Bounds @mirajatxtresor
19 Followers 247 Following Retro/Rockabilly/Vintage/PinUp Girl, Sabretooth Soror, Cosplayer, Steampunk, Renaissance, Bellydancer, Slytherin, Doll Artist, among other things.
Tanya C @TanyaCooke16
4 Followers 25 Following
Stashed Out @StashedOut
26 Followers 246 Following $SYS holder since 2014. Masternodes, blockmarket, NFT. Altcoin trader, stock trader, blockchain. $EOS $XTZ $VET $XLA $KLV $DKNG $EV $WEED stocks, and batteries.
Lindsey M. Albright @NovelistLMA
376 Followers 555 Following I'm an aspiring fiction novelist. I'm always exploring genres but I am in love with the paranormal, so expect a lot of that. My pronouns are she/her.
𝕾𝖑𝖊𝖓𝖉�... @bby_baphomet
682 Followers 491 Following 🖤Ascended from hell🖤I’m a hex girl🖤 Losing me is a crime🖤Texas artist🖤mind your business🖤🌈29♎️ #Emom #poly #teamslender
Ferret Friend @ferretfriend__
7K Followers 228 Following i love ferrets! dm for credit/removal/submissions (i also post minks sometimes)
Daily Ferrets @LadFerret
1K Followers 858 Following Daily ferret posts of a loving family of ferrets who require lots of love and treats ❤️
Ferret Every Hour @FerretPerHour
15K Followers 1 Following Ferrets posted every hour, on the hour. (mostly) All images belong to their original owners. DMS are open for Submissions/Removal
Chris Krebs @C_C_Krebs
233K Followers 3K Following
rekdt @rekdt
11K Followers 716 Following // cybersecurity anarchist // unethical hacker // ex cybersecurity @ aws, wn, else // @redteamvillage_ & @sec_defcon daemon // take sincerely at your own risk
giggly ♡ @xgigglypuff
105K Followers 2K Following harvard graduate + software engineer ♡ she/her ♡ https://t.co/HrGfIvxRQj
sudox @kmcnam1
12K Followers 3K Following CCIEx2 #50931 and a bunch of random paper. Opinions are my own and not the company I work. I guess I'm Green Arrow's daughter or something...
ADHD Memes @ADHDForReal
336K Followers 193 Following Sharing our neurodivergent experiences helps us realize that we are not alone. Most memes are on ADHD, some are on Autism and others are just me being silly.
Crisis of Conscience @crisisofconsc
11K Followers 2K Following TikTok creator. IT Support - L3 Engineer. Gamer. Resto Druid in WoW. Doctoral student in IT. Demon in disguise. I really hate Microsoft Teams.
Lina @d0rkph0enix
37K Followers 10K Following Infosec dork, boxer, poker player, dog owner/operator, spiller of things. Cars, vidya games, and cooking are my jam. #ChiefsKingdom and Royals fanatic. #SecKC
Insane AI slop @FacebookAIslop
136K Followers 1 Following Posting insane AI images from facebook - Main: @TrueSlazac DMs open for submissions
shenetworks @shenetworks
72K Followers 844 Following a menace • hacker • shenetworks @ TikTok & YouTube & Twitch. Co-Host of @breakingthepod. New episodes biweekly.
Posts By Feds @SuspectFed
294K Followers 74 Following RIP Terry. DMs open for submissions (to everyone)
Rod Fergusson @RodFergusson
192K Followers 422 Following SVP, Head of the BioShock Franchise for 2K. Former GM of Diablo at Blizzard. This is my personal account and represents only my opinions/thoughts.
Kevin Mitnick @kevinmitnick
276K Followers 3K Following Chief Hacking Officer @knowbe4, Security Consultant, Public Speaker, & Author Whistling ICBM launch codes since 1988 - account managed by Kimberley Mitnick
self-aware idiot @subparse
238 Followers 2K Following Em • 30 • golem of sadness • born 2 feed • xbox gt: subparse • battlenet: pisces • that one mercy that save u in OT • ♓
DanBock @DanBock
87 Followers 1 Following DanBock's Official Twitter account. All views expressed here are entirely my own, unless I'm posting sarcastically, in which case these views are no one's.
Magic Judges @MagicJudges
11K Followers 72 Following Official Twitter account for the Magic: the Gathering™ Judge Program
SWAGAMEMNON 🎮 @swagamemnon22
11K Followers 657 Following a real rapscallion • @Sabaton fan 🤘🏻 • 🖤 history, music, video games, & TTRPGs 🖤 • midwestern af • serving a life sentence in horny jail • alamo rememberer
shirts that go hard @shirtsthtgohard
1.3M Followers 772 Following DM for credit! I tag original creators whenever possible. Designs I sell are my own. We’re @/goodshirts on IG!
Jeremy Sinclair #ฺN... @sinclairinat0r
11K Followers 7K Following #BlackTechTwitter's anime obsessed, #ADHD cursed, super enthusiastic .NET Dev #WindowsInsider #WIMVP, #WinDevMVP, #AvaloniaMVP #WindowsOnArm @dotnetfdn member
Attivo Networks®, a ... @AttivoNetworks
4K Followers 2K Following Attivo Networks, a SentinelOne company, provides Identity Threat Detection and Response (ITDR) and cyber deception solutions.
Alyssa (she/her) @ramen0x3f
3K Followers 574 Following @ramen0x3f.bsky.social Senior Threat Researcher and Pun Aficionado @Microsoft Former research+red team+hand drawn memes @Mandiant
SentinelOne @SentinelOne
56K Followers 1K Following ONE autonomous platform to prevent, detect, respond, and hunt. Do more, save time, secure your enterprise: https://t.co/N75g1HAnCs 🐱💻
Steve Syfuhs @SteveSyfuhs
16K Followers 2K Following Windows and Authentication at Microsoft. Developer. Mostly dog pictures. Might actually be two dogs in a trench coat. 🇺🇸 / 🇨🇦 @syfuhs.net on blue sky
rudiindra4 @rudiindra4art
2K Followers 253 Following Freelance Illustrator/character designer. for inquiry : [email protected] my prints : https://t.co/99l7EPeRpv
Steph | Available for... @velociraptisart
175 Followers 678 Following Background Painter 🌱 | Looking for work in TV Animation Contact: [email protected]
Play Torchlight @PlayTorchlight
24K Followers 8 Following Torchlight III is the latest entry in the Torchlight series, moving the franchise forward while bringing it back to its roots!
Zie @zie_r_rose
13 Followers 527 Following
TPO! @ MM'25 @TPOCharlemagne
266 Followers 602 Following Fighting game player DATA|TPO! Charlemagne. Overthinker, music lover and foodie. Follow me @ https://t.co/kIPCKITtoA!
Coffeezilla @coffeebreak_YT
735K Followers 2K Following Internet Detective Exposing Scams. Follower of Jesus. Support Investigative Journalism: https://t.co/ATpU5zUzUY Signal Tipline: coffeezilla.01
Mistial Developer @MistialD
195 Followers 71 Following Security Engineer. Developer. All-around miscreant. Sometimes Serious. Often Not.
Dan Taylor @DeltaTangoTwo
881 Followers 2K Following msft's ghost team, Tiramisu expert, used to be technical, Dad x5, former Marine
Mandiant (part of Goo... @Mandiant
127K Followers 4K Following We’re determined to make organizations secure against cyber threats and confident in their readiness.
Jolly Medic @FikeClub
17 Followers 445 Following Lover of Engineering, Professional Tech Shaman, and 3D Print Magician.
@deweyritten@infosec.... @DeweyRitten
2K Followers 626 Following Dormant account: I've migrated to https://t.co/z2e4KnHGSR.
Wynell Bounds @mirajatxtresor
19 Followers 247 Following Retro/Rockabilly/Vintage/PinUp Girl, Sabretooth Soror, Cosplayer, Steampunk, Renaissance, Bellydancer, Slytherin, Doll Artist, among other things.
OWASP® Foundation @owasp
213K Followers 532 Following We improve the security of apps with community-led open source projects, 260 local chapters, and tens of thousands of members worldwide. Famous for OWASP Top 10
Rapid7 @rapid7
123K Followers 3K Following Cybersecurity pros: Rapid7 lets you command your attack surface, smash silos, stay steps ahead of attackers, and take breaches from “inevitable” to preventable.
Tanya C @TanyaCooke16
4 Followers 25 Following
DeFi Mark @MoonMark_
32K Followers 192 Following 4+ years solidity and web3 dev / entrepreneur. I enjoy building innovative DeFi apps! Hundreds of happy clients
Matthew Marshall @NeatShark
37 Followers 452 Following 34 • ace • I love being a nerd • We die, and we need all the help we can get.
Lindsey M. Albright @NovelistLMA
376 Followers 555 Following I'm an aspiring fiction novelist. I'm always exploring genres but I am in love with the paranormal, so expect a lot of that. My pronouns are she/her.
Faxxius IRL @faxxi_irl
22 Followers 49 Following 32, he/him DBJ drinker & sushi eater. sad/depressed/horny tweets rolled into one fat guy stumbling through life.