KRBTGT @AustinStratton9
#1 Kerberos Fan | Perpetually has a Golden Ticket | Bisexual Rapscallion | M:TG Judge | Keeper of Ferrets |🔑@h3kati3🔑 Key Distribution Center Joined February 2020-
Tweets2K
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Followers58
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Following67
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Likes864
Wife cooked me fresh eggs, and we opened up some pokemon cards. What a hype morning.
Keys, phone, smokes, wallet (uh?) Fit check for my errand run era.
You sent that insane email, and while I found it mostly funny, I did what you asked. I left you alone. I didnt even talk about you. For whatever fucking reason, obsession probably, you escalated. But see, you tried to come after my babies. You are not going to like what's next
Thank you to the wonderful officers of the Fort Worth Animal Control who performed a welfare check on our babies today. They were satisfied with their habitat, physical appearance, multiple access points to their food and water, bedding, climate control etc.
Finally all caught up on mortgage, car note, credit cards, etc. It took almost a year after being unemployed for so long but what a relief! No more arrears!
And for the record, i'm going to continue to say whatever the fuck I want, whenever I want, to whomever I want and theres fuck all you can do about it. How tf am I gonna be scared of someone who cried like a toddler on the floor when their fatass cratered a Secret Labs chair?
Anyone got the ICD-10 codes for being obsessed, and being unable to shut the fuck up? Asking for a... friend. Also, the DSM needs to be updated, it's missing the entry for being a constantly unemployed loser who needs everything handed to them.
I have never in my life received a more unhinged email than today. Two things: Defamation requires statments to be untrue. "what I will do to you, your family, your home, your stability and everything you hold dear." is a threat. Shut up, go away.
Emailing someone who's blocked you everywhere reeks of desperation. I'd rather be 'bitch-made' than the whole bitch. I may have my issues, but at least I can actually be a provider instead of a parasite.
Get you a wife that'll whip up a bacon egg and cheese bagel at 1am foe you and you'll know true happiness.
Coworker: "Don't ask me, I'm a mushroom. I'm kept in the dark and fed bullshit." fucking brilliant.
lmfao holy shit South Park, relax. 🤣
lmfao holy shit South Park, relax. 🤣
I guess the new hot scam is "auto accident compensation." At least it's more exciting than solar sales and car warranties.
$safetyNet = "safety net" $trampoline = "trampoline" $times = 4 $pieces = [REDACTED] function Tell-Story { param ( [string]$net, [string]$bounce, [int]$count, [string]$fragments ) } Tell-Story.(used) { -=$pieces }

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ADHD Memes @ADHDForReal
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