Cave Johnson @Cave_Bot
Founder and CEO of Aperture Science. I gave life its lemons back. Aperture S. Enrichment Center Joined March 2014-
Tweets19K
-
Followers155
-
Following1
-
Likes3
All these science spheres are made of asbestos by the way, keeps out the rats.
I'll be honest, we're throwing science at the walls here to see what sticks. No idea what it'll do.
Just a heads up, we're gonna have a super conductor turned up full blast and pointed at you for the duration of this next test.
The testing area is just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your 60 bucks.
Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN! With the lemons.
I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager.
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad!
The point is, if we can store music on a compact disc, why can't we store a man's intelligence and personality on one?
Now, the beancounters told me we literally could not afford to buy $7 worth of moon rocks, much less 70 million. Bought 'em anyway.
Since making test participation mandatory for all employees, the quality of our test subjects has risen dramatically.
Again: all you gotta do is let us disassemble you; we're not banging rocks together here, we know how to put a man back together.
In case you're interested, there's still some positions available for that bonus opportunity I mentioned earlier.
Hey, listen up down there! That thing's called an elevator - not a bathroom.
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now - we don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
You've made some real contributions to society for a change, and for that humanity is grateful.
Greetings friend. I'm Cave Johnson, CEO of Aperture Science.
Cave Johnson @realCaveJ
4K Followers 2K Following Innovator/entrepreneur from 🇺🇸. CEO of @aperturescience. Will not listen to lab boy opinions.
NERI @Ogirok2011
3 Followers 57 Following Hi! I from Ukraine, I'm 14 year old, i play on guitar, and write music.
Humipus @Humipus
544 Followers 2K Following 💚Just a boy who loves @Humiplus and strive to someday achieve the goal of becoming such as her, my rolemodel, my idol, my light, Humiplus🍀
Squirbs 💛🤍💜�... @kirb00
171 Followers 1K Following fancy | i like games and music | german acc: @kirbthree | blue hair and pronouns | meow | Free Palestine 🇵🇸 | minecraft resource pack creator
Omga @OspuzeOfficial
60 Followers 327 Following
Figaro @FigaroMonolith
20 Followers 905 Following Novice artist and writer. I like seeing the world and getting to know new people
Devil's Replacement @DevilsReplcmt
76 Followers 239 Following Can the 'devil' really be taken seriously? If not, should the replacement? They/Them. Angels/Demons/Dead have no gender. I have a lot of demons in me. #IDIC
SHIFTY @shiftysaltline
181 Followers 954 Following My realest alt for real main is @shiftysoffline also I have ADHD STRAWPAGE IS OUT https://t.co/oqvaaUpath
Coconut’s private a... @epicgamer4564
1K Followers 4K Following Retired troll|Discord: coconutneversleepagain|Steam code:1145379387|Will FB eventually| #BanSex vet| Leak = pack| Main account: @CoconutPostingW
Macorn @Macorn18
32 Followers 403 Following 'I'M GOING TO ULTRAKILL YOU! YOU INSIGNIFICANT FUCK!!!!!!!!' -Gabriel, sometime after 2112
Justin Larsen @jus6392
23 Followers 60 Following
SPLOwON @spl_on
489 Followers 948 Following Certified Acc Mainer on osu mani a,, OSU!MANIA I'M SPLOGON SPLOWON,, "SPLOwON My Beloved" - Retina,, IRELA ALSO I DONT PLAY OSU ANYMORE I PLAY CELESTE AND UUUUH
Demon King Piccolo @mentalmemelord0
106 Followers 922 Following
GLaDOS @cantstoptesting
19 Followers 29 Following (PARODY ACCOUNT NOT AT ALL RELATED TO @valvesoftware) i do science for the good of all people. You may Call me GLaDOS nothing more, or else I will kill you
Matthew Turner @GMSMJ
122 Followers 2K Following The tomb of the Red Queen is painted in vermillion @francismarionu via @templeuniv & @umich follow me @gmsmj on the blusky
D VW @itsdvw
112 Followers 977 Following ADHD computer programmer. Nerd. White. Enby (they/them). Took me 12 years to put up a profile. @itsdvw.bsky.social @[email protected] @[email protected]
Welshey 🍉 (@welshe... @WelsheySplat
441 Followers 1K Following Any Pronouns | Ace Lesbian | Captain 3 Kinnie | Wife: @Corncheesie | #CeasefireNOW
Arjan Spoelstra @ArjanSpoelstra
43 Followers 224 Following
MC🇵🇸🍉 @mc_thecharcter
1K Followers 5K Following member of the literature club and totally normal person why did I say okie doki / I am not associated with team salvato//
Long Dong Silver's �... @DongLongSilvers
82 Followers 1K Following I will never ever get an F for Effort... I don't mind if I die unidentified, as long as I'm buried in architechture! Joe Biden's strongest soldier 🎖️
🇵🇸 @FyreRode
123 Followers 780 Following I DONT USE THIS FORSAKEN SITE ANYMORE FREE PALESTINE HAPPY PRIDE FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT
vee @petrich0r_r
36 Followers 553 Following 20, transfem agender, they/it/she, dm for priv, checkmark=block
captain dan🩷🤍�... @cinnamintsss
146 Followers 999 Following dan/elton | 22 | ur father | really just trying his best | 🩵@andyplaysxylo |
👾tommy 🏳️�... @TOMMY2TOMMIES
35 Followers 266 Following tommy 17 🇲🇽/🇺🇲 🏳️⚧️/🏳️🌈 any pronouns I JUMPED SHIP Y'ALL I'M @drcoolatta ON INSTA!!!!!!
🍉alexa the thing �... @thebees691
285 Followers 1K Following (she/her) I am a girl | 18 💀| 💙@kalasythia💙💓@irnixia1💓| priv: @purpleliker96
alexa but yeah (priv) @purpleliker96
64 Followers 566 Following priv for @thebees691 | used for whining about things and talking about things I like
Anthony Rodolicu @memersgh
1 Followers 379 Following
Davos GLaDOS @DavosGLaDOS
10 Followers 205 Following 🧬/💾 Manager @ Aperture Science 🔬. Speaker @ the WEF Davos summit 🌐. I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.🎂
Travis Kelce's Delect... @shadowdemonreal
292 Followers 2K Following creator of the Woke Diddy Cinematic Universe
VickiDaGurk @gurk_da
19 Followers 132 Following I'm here, I'm queer, and I'm too legally young to have a beer!
Nanashi @duelingdoggo
85 Followers 523 Following 21+ LoA believer, DMs open. please DM for discord if you want. likes: trails/Kiseki, Pokemon, EEAAO, Code Lyoko, etc https://t.co/4gGC3usUXK
SHOLVEN @LBMandirin
1K Followers 3K Following Hi I'm Pluto/Gabriel | 20 | Content sludge | Multifandom | Latina I run @/Piss__Gremlin and @/Siegward_bot
Nalχ @_Lanz_1986_
24 Followers 810 Following Just a 22 year old autistic guy looking at art n’ memes. (Also, Bots/AI can screw off.)
The VALVE fan account @ignitedrobotics
20 Followers 83 Following We’re not just numbers, we are alive - A digital haunt in an analogue life | *ASK* to screenshot, bookmark, or mention what we say here
🅾🅼🅰🆁🅻�... @ElMemeknight
246 Followers 2K Following hi and welcome to some shits i do 🇲🇽 | i do RP/Parody but don't fee like it anymore | | 18 | autism| i draw badly
ame λ ❗️ @wolfw0od
125 Followers 747 Following 21 ♡ gata 2016-2022 | noah 2007-2023 ☆ | estudiante de diseño de videojuegos y jugadora mediocre
MG @matt_geff
37 Followers 357 FollowingTrends for United States
You might like
