Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

Mama 👶 Wife 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 Doggy Mama 🐕🐩 Brooklyn, NY Joined November 2011

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Following

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

5 years ago

Can we just all agree to "manly" handshakes?? So sick of being on the receiving end of a wet noodle.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

5 years ago

2020 in a nutshell:

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

Actual footage of me sitting in a chair pretending I'm getting a pedicure. Where are the black market nail salons??

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

Me: Whew, is it Friday yet? Them: It's literally Monday Me:

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Everyone's like "I cleaned my entire apartment," "I baked 100 cookies," "I alphabetized my CD collection from middle school". And I'm over here working a full-time job and watching an infant wondering just how many hours the clocks were turned back.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

TBH I kind of wish I was on a deserted island right about now. I wouldn't have to worry about contact with other people and I would have an awesome tan. Win-win.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

New reality show - The Real World: I Forgot I Was Cooking. This episode - Cauliflower Rice Burned to the Pan. Stay tuned for next week!

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Baltimore Ravens @Ravens

6 years ago

We're going to make one lucky fan's Christmas VERY merry❗️ RT to win this signed @Lj_era8 jersey❗️ A gift for the best fans in the world 🎁

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

Now I know why moms wake up at 4am. It's the only time they can drink their entire cup of coffee in peace.

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Laura Perlongo @LauraPerlongo

6 years ago

motherhood is packing every permutation of outfit for each potential activity scenario (including stuff you have 15% chance of doing) for your children and looking down at the pants you’ve worn for 3 months straight and saying ‘eh these’ll do’

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

Welp. I guess I will never drink an entire cup of coffee while it's hot ever again. #momprobs

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

They were wrong. You CAN cry over spilled (breast)milk. #momlife

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

6 years ago

I'd like to thank the @Yankees for this round of pneumonia my unborn child and I will be facing after sitting in the cold/rain for 2+ hours last night. Nice to know you care about your fans.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

7 years ago

When you get up to get a glass of water and then decide you need a handful of almonds, forget the water and go sit down. #pregnancyproblems

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

7 years ago

This is me learning that Galentine's day is not just Valentine's day for single ladies, but actually a separate day.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

7 years ago

😭😭

NFL @NFL

7 years ago

😭😭

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

7 years ago

Uberpool etiquette: SCOOCH OVER FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO GET IN. Don't make me walk into traffic because you're so self-absorbed that you're pretending to not see me standing there. Stop being cheap and pay for a regular Uber.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

7 years ago

So... 52 days til baseball.

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Chelsea T @ChelseaTable

7 years ago

I always microwave my @udisglutenfree bagels so that they are easier to cut before toasting them. I was surprised to hear a clanging noise this morning. I look and there's a screw inside my bagel. (Hope my microwave is ok since I just microwaved a piece of metal.)