Tesco delivery driver arrives.
I put my barking dog in another room.
Him: What dog is it?
Me: A chocolate lab.
Him: Will she run out the front door?
Me: No. She’ll just get in the way.
Him: I don’t mind her being in the way.
Me: Would you like to see the dog?
Him: Yes please.
If I was on me deathbed and one of my grandkids started taking pictures of my hand for social media as I’m fading away I’d get one more little surge of energy to stand up and bait the bollox out of them
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