Doug Ducey (Parody) @DougDuceyNot
If you’re looking for a headline, this is a satirical account of the non-masked leader of Arizona. Joined June 2020-
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Hey @BarnettforAZ if you can’t get a yelp rating above 3, why should anyone trust you in Congress? Dirty gym. Terrible bathrooms. People scammed out of money. Why would we trust you with our budget?
Hey @BarnettforAZ if you can’t get a yelp rating above 3, why should anyone trust you in Congress? Dirty gym. Terrible bathrooms. People scammed out of money. Why would we trust you with our budget?
Standing next to a SOCIAL DISTANCING sign he goes up and gets close to a girl who has leukemia. If he gets her sick, I want him arrested for murder.
Standing next to a SOCIAL DISTANCING sign he goes up and gets close to a girl who has leukemia. If he gets her sick, I want him arrested for murder.
Somehow, the Kanye shit isn’t the worst thing shown. Flag mask is a violation of the flag code, but this big patriot would Know that I’m sure. Hair is a violation of human sight.
Somehow, the Kanye shit isn’t the worst thing shown. Flag mask is a violation of the flag code, but this big patriot would Know that I’m sure. Hair is a violation of human sight.
Big words from a tiny brain. A mental disorder. This guy is running for Congress and says shit like this. I hope he’s beaten. Severely.
Big words from a tiny brain. A mental disorder. This guy is running for Congress and says shit like this. I hope he’s beaten. Severely.
I’d love for one of these morons to come to my door right now
No masks on two of them. No brain between the three of them.
This guy doesn’t need to lose any more weight. He is obviously missing a few pounds between his ears.
This guy doesn’t need to lose any more weight. He is obviously missing a few pounds between his ears.
Any campaign that sends out people to knock doors in a 115-degree day during a global pandemic is dumber than I am. This coming from the guy who thinks hot dog parachutes will save us all.
Try using a hot dog to get your message across.
HAHAHAHAHA PATTY GETTIN ROASTED Now wait for his spouse to attack Craig on Twitter.
HAHAHAHAHA PATTY GETTIN ROASTED Now wait for his spouse to attack Craig on Twitter.
WHY IS THIS NOT A BIGGER ISSUE
THEY DIDNT ORDER SANDWICHES LIKE I DEMANDED
A mask mandate is old news. Move on. Other topics I’m failing: Getting mad and punting on unemployment Not giving a shit about schools Spending $3M on a hot dog parachute Allowing a hot dog parachute to be aired PICK ONE AND FOCUS
Sorry, people, but here’s the truth: A statewide mask mandate won’t do shit. If people are wearing them, they’re wearing them. The rest of the morons won’t care if I mandate it. Cities already did my dirty work. I’m screwing up a lot, find a new topic.
Three million dollars to all these PR firms for a hot dog parachute. Why didn’t we split that money up to the unemployed; I’m sure one of them could have come up with something better. @Scarpinato WHAT ARE WE DOING
New Coldstone flavors: Fudge numbers COVID ice Also changing “like it” to “32%” because the smallest should be equal to my approval rating.
WE SPENT THREE MILLION ON A HOT DOG PARACHUTE??! @Scarpinato WHAT THE HELL? THIS IS ABUSE OF PUBLIC FUNDS!
WE SPENT THREE MILLION ON A HOT DOG PARACHUTE??! @Scarpinato WHAT THE HELL? THIS IS ABUSE OF PUBLIC FUNDS!
You’re safer at home. Especially if hot dogs are falling from the sky, parachute or not.
You weren’t dreaming yesterday. My plan to fix this is really a hot dog with a parachute. Why do you still have a job @Scarpinato?
Tests down for a week. Takes victory lap. Case number skyrockets today. Amazing timing, you say? Just as I worked it.
Josh '𝕿𝖍𝖊 �.. @AZNotoriousJPG
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Jeremy Duda @jeremyduda
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Steven Slugocki @Slugocki
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@BarnettforAZ @brahmresnik Show me Israel, I’m waiting
@BarnettforAZ @BarnettforAZ you're a mental disorder. Just take the entire bottle of HCQ. Im told its helps demon semen like you.
@DougDuceyNot Have you heard about our Lord and Savior Donald J Trump? If you like serving a master, well, DJT is the man for you.
@DougDuceyNot Idk that would require the Cold War 2.0 to not heat up
@DougDuceyNot This is a very good point maybe my head is too stuck in pandemic mode, we shall see.
@chrisherstam BTW - Guv's office altered the July 23 press release today after @PatPtak accused me of having my facts wrong, even though the governor said the $3 mil was coming from his office. Facts matter. When we make an error, we run a correction.
Can’t report when someone is sexually assaulting students in your charge. Can’t protect students in your charge from a sexual predator. Can’t tell the truth about about the sexual assault of students in your charge. Shut up until you can tell the truth about that & take a seat!
Can’t go to church. Can’t go to work. Can’t go to school. Even Dr. Fauci says protesting is dangerous. But Democrats encourage people to riot and protest in the streets.
I'm calling it like it is. My opponent literally sits on her friendly tv stations and lies to Americans. Irresponsible yet predictable. Our country recorder is a former Marine. Give the many who actually served this country as much respect as you do the draft dodger.
📺WATCH my interview on @MorningsMaria where I discuss the threat of fraud in the Dem-pushed mass mail-in voting system where anyone can get a ballot w/o verification. Plus, we cover the injustice against Michael Flynn as Dems on the D.C. Circuit Court go after @realDonaldTrump.
@DougDuceyNot I know you act like you’re mad at @SonoraQuestLabs but they didn’t fuck up near as bad as you did. And why are you attaching them anyways? Don’t you have goons on staff to do your dirty work?
@DougDuceyNot Parachuting hot dogs....
@DougDucey @DougDuceyNot Hmmm. Not a parody when It’s true.
I implore the reporters to stop asking me harassing questions. I’ll only get mad, you'll only get a shitty answer, and the general public will not like you.
Donald Trump should be charged with the murder of Herman Cain.
Unemployment Insurance at a rate of $240.00 in Arizona has always been a problem. One of the lowest in the nation in a state with high utility rates aa well as high rental costs it’s no wonder that homeless numbers are increasing. @DougDucey
@DougDuceyNot I'm living for your tweets. They are the only thing that make these lather, rinse, repeat press conferences bearable...
@DougDuceyNot Can we get this again?
@SenMcSallyAZ And one more day closer to holding yij accountable, as we vote you OUT!
@THEHermanCain I am sorry he was killed by the #TrumpVirus
@RepAndyBiggsAZ @RepAndyBiggsAZ, this is why listening to Birx/Fauci is important. This is why 172 AZ residents are no more today. This is why 153k US citizens are no more. This is why you need to wear a mask. This is why you need to shut up and listen to those who are smarter than you.
@RepAndyBiggsAZ Biggs. You are an idiot. And Cain trusted Trump.
So happy cases are down so that I can have another press conference, announce completely vague shit, take a victory lap, and get mad at female reporters. I love my job.
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