Real Emergencies @Emergency78
I work in a hospital & look at ER visits all day. these are verbatim what patients write as their reason for visit when they fill out paperwork favstar.fm/users/Emergenc… Joined March 2010-
Tweets312
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Followers365
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Following43
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Likes30
What brings you in for your mental health evaluation today: I need catarac sergery
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i committed suicide two weeks ago
"You guys took an oath to take care of me in sickness and in health!" no dude, that's a wedding
"if I have sex with my pregnant girlfriend while I'm on drugs, will the baby get addicted to drugs?"
Psych hospital call center: "I'm sorry sir, there are no beds available" "What if I told you I'm white?"
cafeteria at the mental hospital I overhear a teenager showing new kid around: "That's the OCD table. They sit together because they're OCD"
@TheBigEasyofOz it's really a thing!
That’s why I’m wearing this mask, ‘cause it smells when I burp.
i am not pregnant. i do not have a uterus. but i feel like i'm about to push out a baby.
court order to have liver checked
got blown off the porch with porch
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