Emily Chandlec @EmilyChandlec
Don't hate me because I love mobile life. Let's go! Joined April 2010-
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Aphorisms rarely change lives, including this one.
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"Everyday, give yourself a good mental shampoo." - Dr. Sara Jordan
anger management!!! who the hell said i need anger management??
i feel the most connected to other human beings when were making subtle eye contact about someones outrageous stank on the subway
walk in the club like whaddup I got a oh no oh god wrong building im so sorry continue with your funeral god bless
Eye of the tiger. Nose of the lion. Mouth of the lynx. Ear of the bobcat. Throat of the cougar. Forehead of the ocelot.
I hate going to pancake houses because it just reminds me that I bought a stupid, non-delicious house.
When someone looks over my shoulder while I'm on the computer, I open up a new tab and start searching, 'HOW TO KILL THE PERSON BEHIND ME.'
I want to inspire people. I want someone to look at me and say, "Because of you I didn't give up."
"An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest." - Benjamin Franklin
That awkward moment when ????? wants to add you on Facebook.
"Seven days without laughter makes one weak." - Mort Walker
You do not have to attend every argument you are invited to
Facebook: a place where people announce their problems to the world but not to the person they have a problem with.
I just got breakfast 3 minutes past McDonald's cut off time. I'm pretty sure this is how it feels to be a celebrity.
As a kid my mom laughed at me because I was always worrying about being shot with a crossbow while on the toilet. Well who's laughing now?
2 hr flight, better buy 8 lbs of fruit and nut mix.
I always keep a baseball bat under my bed... just in case someone breaks in and throws a ball at me.
your reputation in high school doesn't matter once you graduate anyways so why spend 4 years trying to impress people you'll never see again
*ends every piece of advice with ?idk though? so that its not my fault if i ruin ur life*
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