ALIENS ARE COMING. Could be tomorrow, could be late.
The welcome won’t write itself. $CONTACT — say hello first.
What this is: one story for two civilizations.jup.ag/tokens/FDyD4YS… EarthJoined August 2025
BREAKING: Scientists reveal the interstellar object 3I/ATLAS, a Manhattan-sized comet suspected of possibly carrying alien technology, is far larger than originally believed.
Mexico’s Congress showed off two “alien mummies” with three fingers. 🎭
The internet collectively said, “Nice props, guys.”
If that’s first contact, ET has a weird skincare routine.
NASA blasted Earth with a fake alien signal in 2023 just to test reactions. 📞
We basically prank-called ourselves because the real aliens ghosted us.
ET: still ignoring our texts. Humans: desperate much?
With aid of James Webb Space Telescope, astronomers detected 2 biosignatures, the strongest evidence ever of possible life beyond Earth on K2-18b, an exoplanet 124 light-years away. I appeared on @NBCNewsNow to discuss these findings. #K218b#K2_18b@NASAWebb
In 2023, scientists sent aliens our DNA code, Earth’s coordinates… and pixelated nudes. 🥒
First contact, and we’re already oversharing.
Imagine aliens scrolling: “Thanks, but keep it on OnlyFans.”
NASA hired a UFO research director in 2023… but kept the name secret. 🕶️
Apparently even scientists don’t want UFO Twitter in their DMs.
Earth’s top alien guy: working undercover like it’s Men in Black.
Astronomers say a signal we sent in 2002 could get a reply in 2029. ⏳
We basically butt-dialed the galaxy and are waiting decades for a callback.
Aliens: typing… Humans: still staring at the chat bubble.
🖖 Fellow Humans!
This is important. $CONTACT only works if we build it together—scratch to stardust. Every reward flows back to contributors. No outsiders. Just us.
Yes, it’s ambitious. Yes, it’s possible. But only if we move as one crew.
So far, we’ve nailed content. The…
A U.S. whistleblower told Congress the Pentagon has “nonhuman biologics.” 🧊
Translation: alien corpses in storage, casually discussed over C-SPAN.
No biggie — just weekend plans with the undead.
🖖 Humans!
This post has officially become our most successful transmission so far—the jokes, the chaos, the cosmic timing. 👽✨
Update from Mission Comedy:
Earlier we capped rewards at 20 jokes… but now we’ve decided to reward all contributors who dropped a joke. 🛸
20,000…
🖖 Humans!
This post has officially become our most successful transmission so far—the jokes, the chaos, the cosmic timing. 👽✨
Update from Mission Comedy:
Earlier we capped rewards at 20 jokes… but now we’ve decided to reward all contributors who dropped a joke. 🛸
20,000…
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