Ben 'DryBean' Monkfish @GrumpyMuso
The UK's most in demand session Maraca professional. Current Maraca mix 60 / 40 dried butter beans (cook at 182° for 18 mins) & uncooked brown organic rice Joined June 2019-
Tweets38
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Followers16
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Following215
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Likes16
True artists like me dedicate our lives to a beautiful instrument (like my beloved Maracas) and we don’t play these nonsense publicity games. I only express my soul in the clatter of dry beans on the gourd
I’ll bet you €1,000,000 that Stormzy & Maya Jama were never ACTUALLY together. All you lot are heartbroken, but this whole drama is PR fiction. Unpopular hot take, but fucking true as shit.
Funny how the people behind this show are called Re:Imagine when literally zero imagination has been involved #baitshit
Musicians! Want to progress your career?? Take a photo of yourself next to a mixing desk and say ‘new music coming soon’ you don’t even have to follow it up with a release... but it will remind your social media contacts that you exist and you’ll get some gigs from it for sure
@SheilaEdrummer from one top session pro to another... are you ever concerned about ethical & moral issues regarding the Maracas? My heart wants to find a zero-plastic vegan Maraca. But they all sound so terrible, no bite or warmth. Such a dilemma #sessionpro #topukmaracapro
@freddiegavita Home sweet home!
If you arrive at your gig and see this sound system. Turn around, delete the bookers number from your phone and burn down the venue just to be on the safe side #campaignagainsteartorture
Handful of spaces available on my “Hand Painted Hand Percussion” workshop eventbrite.com/drybeanspercsh… trust me, nothing beats the feeling of holding your own instrument in your hand and shaking it back and forth in perfect rhythm #maracapro #eventprofs
@British_Airways Tonight when I “shake beans” (industry phrase) I shall be thinking of you Cody
@British_Airways Thank you Cody, you are truly doing gods work helping re-unite me with my custom vintage hand painted hand percussion. I have filled in this document you have linked to me. When I perform on my Maracas I do it all for everyday heroes like yourself. I’m forever thankful
@British_Airways I was on the 19:35 BA444 Flight to Amsterdam from Heathrow tonight. travelling with a pair of vintage hand-painted Mexican maracas. They are classic gourd style maraca with turned wood handles with a southwestern colour theme of orange, red, green, and white...
@British_Airways still no word on my precious Maracas. Outrageous. There’s going to be a very disappointed client tonight if we have to cut my Maraca feature in Moves Like Jagger... @BA_tea_bag can you help ?
inside a distinctive custom white & chrome-plated case with bell-end corners to help shield from any impacts.Have never put my instruments in the hold before and (after your staff INSISTED it would be fine) my livelihood as the UKs top session Maraca player has been jeopardised
in case it helps @British_Airways track down my lost Maracas they have a Calabash head w/ a beautiful blend (40/30/30) of sand, seeds & dried red beans (174° cook for 22mins), lovely soft sound. shake it gently and you'll feel a deep sense of calm.should be instantly recognisable
minimum fee is £500 + a gram of chang as my per diem (no pub grub tho, only quality tucker). gonna need someone else to drive me there and back too as the boys in blue confiscated my bloody license again
by some miracle I've not got a gig this Saturday, sorry to burst your bubble - but even the UK's most highly decorated Maraca specialist gaps in the calendar. when you've recovered from the shock of my suprise availability please pick up the phone and offer me a sodding gig
stayed up all night doing gak with a music exec. spent most of the time slagging off the techs for doing to much gear during the tour. fucking unprofessional. only special magic music people can behave like bell ends and get away with it guys, leave it to the pros
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