Kellie Parker @ImproperContent
Ramblings from a typical white girl. ...Sometimes I think I'm funny... it's probably just me. IG: KLegende CO to OC Transplant Joined December 2013-
Tweets31
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Followers110
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Following405
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Likes10
You know you've been in Vegas too long when you start calculating a tip for the grocery cashier #VegasProblems #MoneyPit #LasVegas #Lucky
OC comin' in hot! #SundayFunday #WifeyTime #OrangeCounty #LasVegas #LV2OC instagram.com/p/l5h0NHgVbW/
Some girls wish for Loubies and Prada, I just want to go to a hockey game with @mikescocozza #MikeScocozza #NHL #ComboOfEpicProportions
I find it ironic that the colors red, white and blue are the colors of freedom... until they're flashing behind you #AintNobodyGotTimeFor50
My mother just used the word "kattywampus" & not in a "trying to be funny" kind of way #Kattywampus #WTF #Mom #TGIF #VernacularProblems
To this day I still find myself wondering if that bitch ever moved out of Ludacris' way... #Ludacris #GangsterGuessing #DeepMovingThoughts
Porn & Disney are responsible for the most frustrated people I know "Where's my Prince Charming? Where's my insatiable whore?" #WakeUpPeople
I'm no longer human. I am now jello. Thank you yoga for training me to wrap my legs behind my head in 105° heat. #ImportantLifeSkills #Ommm
Snapbacks & tats? No honey, GOOD JOBS & NICE SUITS. Your partying isn't impressive, tell me about your career ambitions. That turns me on.
My liver feels about as good as Kaepernick right now. Go Hawks #SundayFunday #FootballFun #Seahawks #Kakawww
Life decisions: You make it past the Coachella standby cue for tickets right as your boss walks into your office #ToughLifeChoices #SoClose
Remember to be appreciative of the small things. For instance, tonight, I am extremely grateful for my wine opener. #BoozyMusings #Vino #Yay
If you wake up in the afternoon Jan 2 still wearing your NYE outfit, you probably had a good time #CongoRock #TurnedUp #BlewUp #Bassmnt #SD
Appropriate moment to be terrified: Your spray tan artist says she's been up for 24 hours then pours her latte into the bronzing mix #OhCrap
About to hit up some hot yoga... it's like regular yoga, but with hot babes in it. #Yoga #SweatSessions #MoveYourAsana
Printing out the Groupon to your gym membership counts as starting right??? #BabySteps #Groupon #Gym #GottaStartSomewhere
I knew just what I had to be, when I heard you say what you said to me #PMJams #BenPearce #WhatIMightDo: youtu.be/mFhSLB-Ys0k via @YouTube
To do is to be -Plato, To be is to do -Kant, Do Be Do Be Do -Sinatra #WordsOfWisdom #Sinatra #Plato #Kant #DoBeDoBeDo
Just sat next to a sleeping man holding a sleeping newborn on his lap for a 3 hour flight. Adorable yet terrifying #Turbulance #DontDropBaby
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