JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

This account is a commentary on the interactions between students and JCPS. For satire use only. Joined January 2016

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

6 months ago

If we do another NTI day, half of you will be mad. If we have a normal school day, the other half of you will be mad. So we've decided to do a third, worse thing. JCPS will operate on a two hour delay, to provide you additional time to wade to school.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

6 months ago

Please be patient. We're working on something here...

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

9 months ago

The kids are already doing math again. Nature is healing.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

9 months ago

The weather outside is offending And the snow seems never-ending Another snow day's proposed Everyone around us is closed But JCPS is "Decision Pending"

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

9 months ago

This is our last-ditch effort: to get everyone so heated that the side roads become passable.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

9 months ago

Okay kids, go ahead and enjoy your extended winter break! We plan to have so much fun keeping you guessing about Tuesday's status all day tomorrow!

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

9 months ago

Temperatures: Freezing Snow: Falling Ice: Incoming Roads: Terrible Driving: Hazardous Decision: Pending

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

9 months ago

You're probably wondering if you're going to have school tomorrow while the entire state of Kentucky is encased in ice and snow. But if we told you now, we'd miss out on the comedy of hours of JCPS students begging, threatening, demanding, and honing their argumentation skills.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

a year ago

This sentence is longer-winded than the storm is going to be. 👀💨🍃 @TwilightH0ney

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

a year ago

We're pleased to announce that unlike last year, none of our kids are getting off the bus at 10:30pm tonight! We fixed it! (by making you drive your own kids to and from school)

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

a year ago

Happy first day of school for those who celebrate.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

a year ago

On the positive side, returning to school in November after being out for over five months will definitely give parents something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. wdrb.com/news/education…

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

a year ago

This busing issue has serious ramifications for nearly 100,000 students, their families, employees, and employers throughout the city. That is why we gave you 23 minutes notice about this meeting we're holding in a Circle K restroom handicapped stall with no overflow space.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

2 years ago

Your opinion is very important to us. Please hold, and your board member will hear your concerns right after they vote the way they have been planning to vote for weeks or even months now.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

2 years ago

Please make sure to fill out the Transportation Feedback Form on our website, which we made available literally DOZENS of hours before we vote to do whatever we want regardless of what you think. Rest assured your feedback will be given the consideration we think it deserves.

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JCPS Satire @JCPS_PR

2 years ago

Our plan is to have school tomorrow like normal, and then if even a snowflake falls, everyone can yell at us. Then next time there's a snow forecast we'll cancel, and then everyone will yell at us when the roads are fine. And we'll just keep repeating that cycle until March.