Anthony Kiper @KiperAnthony

My little brother got punched in the face at 12. So, I took him to the gym. Now he deadlifts 455lbs and wins wrestling tournaments. Here are 13 must-dos if you want to help a young man gain confidence: 𝟏. 𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲. I work out with my little brother. I do ice baths with my little brother. These activities teach him to overcome adversity in a controlled fashion. Expose young men to controlled adversity so they can handle the challenges of life. 𝟐. 𝐁𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟. Could you give a homeless person a $100 bill if you didn’t have $100 yourself? You can’t give something you don’t have. Schedule time to build your own confidence with things like working out, ice baths, or BJJ. Fill your cup first so you may pour it out into others. 𝟑. 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐰𝐢𝐧. My little brother competes with me in everything. But, his confidence comes from the wins in his personal life and his competitiveness comes from the L’s to the man he looks up to. (P.S. This doesn’t mean he won’t beat you. My little brother has taken me down in BJJ and landed punches in Muay Thai. He’s surpassed me in guitar. He has beaten me, but I don’t go easy on him.) 𝟒. 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠. At first, my little brother rejected what he was told but followed the example he would see. Now, he values my every word. Become confident, disciplined, and strong so that your word holds weight. 𝟓. 𝐁𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐲. In conversations with my little brother, I positively reinforce his God-given gifts and personality traits. This builds his identity: his perception of WHO HE IS. His identity stays with him forever and translates into every area of life. 𝟔. 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬. My little brother has accomplished a lot but has failed a lot. A young man’s confidence comes from who he is, not just what he does. Praise his wins but don’t let them become the entire focus. 𝟕. 𝐒𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞-𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐧. My little brother's trust in me drastically increased when he met my friends and business partners. They share my values, beliefs, and confidence. Introduce the young man in your life to your friends and mentors - this gives his mind more evidence that he can trust you. 𝟖. 𝐁𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭. My little brother and I lift together. My little brother and I train in combat sports together. My little brother and I go to the range together. Schedule bonding activities like workouts, physical challenges, and hobbies with the young man you are called to lead. 𝟗. 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐥𝐚𝐰𝐬. It’s easier for young men to trust someone they can relate to. It’s hard for young men to relate to someone who appears to be perfect on the outside. My little brother knows my failures and he’s seen my success. Be honest about your mistakes, correct them, and share the lessons you learned in the process. 𝟏𝟎. 𝐆𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲. I ask my brother for help with things that he’s good at. Even if I could’ve figured it out myself. This is a practical way for him to practice leadership. Let young men lead you so they can learn to lead others. TLDR? It starts with you. If you want to give confidence, gain confidence. If you want to teach strength, become strong. If you want to teach self-respect, respect yourself first. Older brothers, dads, and mentors, let's help each other out. What advice would you give?

@Ziyechman Israel Adesanya

I don’t know who needs to hear this but Chronic Busy-ness is sometimes a symptom of not feeling able to sit with emotional discomfort.