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Isaiah Mahon retweeted
Chipotle should be open 24/7.
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Isaiah Mahon retweeted
I made my bed and found a half eaten stick of butter in it. When I asked my child if she put anything in mommy’s bed, she said “I did not put butter in it.” The mystery continues. More at 11.
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
i would feel safer leaving my child with a drag queen than any member of the clergy
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
Mouth roofs should be made of stronger material why is one slice of toast causing bloodshed
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
flies love getting inside a room and pretending they can’t get out. grow up
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
A BUNCH OF KIDS JUST DIED AND THIS IS THE TOP PRIORITY!?!?
BREAKING: Texas State Representative Bryan Slaton (R) announces he will file legislation to BAN drag shows in the presence of minors.
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
HOW FAST DID AIRPORT SECURITY CHANGE AFTER 9/11? WHY ARE WE NOT DOING THE SAME FOR OUR KIDS?
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
Hey guys I’m so thrilled to announce that I’ll no longer be thinking! This has been a lifelong goal, and I’m so grateful to everyone who helped get me here
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
Whos old enough to remember.
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
jesus: eat this bread, it is my body peter: actually i’m gluten free jesus: peter i swear to fucking god
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
fried pickles with ranch is superior
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
the movie has a singing mermaid and octopus
BREAKING: Texas State Representative Bryan Slaton (R) announces he will file legislation to BAN drag shows in the presence of minors.
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
there’s a party on the roof of my apartment complex and i didn’t get an invite. i hold the elevator for everybody. i’m sick
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
Every dog at a bar is a tiny celebrity
Isaiah Mahon retweeted
this was not in the choreography. why my little cousin do this at the end? 😂
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