Demba Ba @NotDembaBa
Demba Ba. Like a sheep, but better at football. Kensington Joined June 2011-
Tweets125
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Followers505
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Following4
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Likes6
Sunderland, you are going to get fucking Demba'd
Hazard forgot his training kit so he has to wear the 'spare' shorts, which I know for a fact Wilian rubs his sweaty bum crack on
Eto'o quietly pointed out to him that he's a German, and Andre told him to 'Fack off yew fackin mag' #identitycrisis
Schurrle is saying he wants Bayern in the semi final, and keeps calling them 'Kraut cunts' in a Cockney accent
Ivanovic actually believes him though, and keeps asking 'Demba why are you practicing defending?'
JT's just come into training with boot polish all over his face claiming he scored the winning goal last night. Twat.
Now Jose's ringing Moyes off the dressing room speakerphone and calling him a bottling twat
Luiz keeps trying to kiss Petr on the lips, and saying 'sorry I thought it was a Czech celebration' when Petr reacts angrily
"Demba Ba is my man, you're shit mate"
Jose is making everyone call me 'King Demba',has given me a crown of Frank's underpants, and is making Nando drink champagne out of my socks
Just left training with @notelnino9 , had to teach him the offside rule.
All these rumours about me moving are true. Jose walked in on a three way Skype session between me, Pardew and Tiote.
Just bring me on Jose, I'll smash these until Tim Sherwood weeps tears from his ugly face
I ate three mouthfuls of the puke before realising it wasn't the chicken bhuna I'd asked for
Getting sick of this shit now. Just woke up next to my toilet, with a curry in the toilet and puke on a plate.
He's just found the pictures of Andre Wisdom getting his car stuck in the mud. Howling like a whipped dog #dontmakemegoJose
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