Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

Caffeine, Valium, and Metamucil, w a shot of fuckwit observations from a bleeding-heart liberal of a Texan with fake nails and a shotgun. oh my life is so hard America Joined November 2015

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Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

8 years ago

I like sparkly things. #MyBiggestFlawIn4Words

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Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

8 years ago

@MuppetBeanPods @datageneral @mattyglesias @TrentonHassles Oh kudos to you sir. I doff my aluminum hat to you and applaud you vociferously.

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Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

8 years ago

There's not enough Klonopin to get "Flagpole Sitta" out of your head. Or at least not out of mine. Yet.

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Manda Skeptically 🦾🥦🏳️‍🌈 @ShutUpAmanda

8 years ago

I’m so irritated with these #MAGAts thinkin theoretical babies are more important than actual ones. They’re fine when a very-real 7-year-old migrant girl dies of dehydration, but when a woman gets an abortion it’s “murder”. Dumbass cyberhicks.

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Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

8 years ago

@godless_mom I shouldn't be surprised by how little actual advice you got. Since our coloring is very similar, I would also suggest Bountiful Blush from Clinque Chubby Stick balm. Depending on if you wear purples or oranges, Benefit's sheer balms are gorgeous as well.

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Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

8 years ago

@godless_mom You can never go wrong with Black Honey by Clinique. It's a perfect sheer (not as dark as it sounds) and wears well.

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Dax Gigandet @Dax_Gigandet

8 years ago

Raise your hand if you know it's a crime to lie to the FBI. 🖐

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Manda Skeptically 🦾🥦🏳️‍🌈 @ShutUpAmanda

8 years ago

#WhileWaitingInLine at Planned Parenthood I saw women get preventative cancer screenings, STD treatment, Prophylactic birth control, hormone therapy and infertility services... It’s almost like...they do a lot of good and people should stop being dicks about it.

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Bobby Henderson @henderob

8 years ago

Can't believe it's that time of year again ...

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Trunk Dinkerbell @OMLISH

8 years ago

I need a new word for Uterus. My fertile childbearing years are done. Its not a womb, awaiting life. It's more like a nauseated wombat, shuffling along aimlessly, awaiting another 23 days before it can barf everywhere again.

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Michelle Wolf @michelleisawolf

8 years ago

I bet you'd be on my side if I had killed a journalist. #BeBest

Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump

8 years ago

So-called comedian Michelle Wolf bombed so badly last year at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner that this year, for the first time in decades, they will have an author instead of a comedian. Good first step in comeback of a dying evening and tradition! Maybe I will go?