The Poop Narratives @PoopNarratives
Real-life poop story excerpts from two regular chicks. Joined June 2015-
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This morning I had a 12-wiper. That's the worst.
Why would you leave poop and blood in a public toilet. At the office. Which isn't shared with any other company? Gross. Women are gross
"I have to poop, ok!! I'm pissed off because I have to poop and can't!! 5 days of this!!! You'd be mad, too."
"Don't you ever have a bad enough experience where you just feel like you smell like poop?"
"Chocolate all over my pants. Crotch area. What the heck!? Looks like crotch poop." :(
Women are sick. There's always sh!t all over the toilets in the morning. People just BLAST. I swear, it was on the wall. It smells. Adults!
Her: Here we go! Stomach again! // Me: You just need to poop. Or you've given yourself an ulcer. Get yourself together.
"Hopefully it's a good trip & I won't have to slap the BF while he's taking a poop. It's great timing. He can't go anywhere. Slap!"
I had Mexican last night & I'm on an antibiotic. On the way to Dad's I almost pooped my pants. Seatbelt off, almost had to evacuate vehicle.
Quotes from my Inbox: "I'm pooping water. Next time I need an enema I'll call you for Thai food. I mean seriously!? Every 20 minutes now."
Her: Did you blow it up in there? Me: Yes, stall 1. Sorry. Wasn't a blow up, though. Her: Well it was a stinker! Me: Oops.
OH there is a ghost in the toilet. A ghost poop.
"I may burp, and fart and like football and beer but I do still like sweet things and romantic things, you know. I feel he forgets at times"
"I'm so bloated with water and poop. I just know it. I mean my eyes are watering.. and I'm actually sweating. All the salt. I'm at my max."
Quotes from my Inbox: "I almost pooped myself in Target. Back home soon will respond."
Nothing's worse than an emergency situation at the office... you walk into the bathroom and there's a full house. Convos, primping. Get out!
I'm going to bring TP. Something. Don't judge me if I poop in the woods. Mid-race poop.
"I just pooped a little poop that was lethally smelly. Mixture of burnt hair & poo."
"I shouldn't have farted. Miscalculated. Driving back home... it's bad, and I'm wearing a dress. OMG what is wrong with me?!"
You think asparagus pee is scary?!?.... not quite as scary as purple beet-poop! Freaky!
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