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Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

You just had an internet surfing accident. Are you OK? Seattle, WA Joined January 2011
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RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

Some of you need to learn about punctuation

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

Which bird has a throat pouch that's completely useless for storing fish? The pelican't. I'll see myself to the gallow...

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

I imagine you all just think "Thank fuck I managed not to say that... Now where can I get rid of it?" and that's why I'm following.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

So Jesus went zombie after three days?

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

What? Putting my foot in my mouth is just part of my work out routine.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

Note to self: You should have just remebered this, moron.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

In this neighborhood we show our ass kicking shoes. Stay out or be out.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

If you're right all the time it must be comforting to know there's always someone left out there to prove wrong.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

When did the internet become all about telling me I've done everything wrong all my life?

Samantha Case retweeted
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AmberTozer @AmberTozer

10 years ago

When you're about to tell them that last night was fun but you don't want a relationship right now

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

The world's tallest mermaid.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

Defrost means "to voluntarily wait salivating for longer than necessary" in microwave.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

You know when you're at the stage when you just stare into the screen and circle the pointer around? You do? Well, that's comforting.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

Once a tweet makes you hear the Benny Hill Show theme in your head it keeps happening over and over again.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

The best part of sneezing with headphones on is getting to listen to music at a godzillion decibels for a split second.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

"OK, duck face products. Let's think outside the box. Ideas?" "Well, I got this dog that I hate..."

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Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

Hold it right there. You need to fill out this eye contact form first.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

*knocks on gates of hell* Yeah... Hi there! I heard you dismiss christians here. Can I come in and take a look?

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

I seem to be allocated a smaller amount of fucks to give every year.

RemainingTheSam Profile Picture

Samantha Case @RemainingTheSam

10 years ago

"Yeah well studies show stuff all the time..." Me talking to internet ads and perhaps needing to get out more on weekends.

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