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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

The Teddy Bear That Came To Life. // Parody Account // Joined July 2012
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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Nicki Minaj: Pink hair. Katy Perry: Blue Hair. Rhianna: Red Hair [&] Lady GaGa: Green Hair. THE FREAKING POWER RANGERS ARE BACK!

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

FUCK MAGIC MIKE

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Grab my new iPhone app! Talking Ted is available on the IPhone app store.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

A lion would never cheat on his wife, but a tiger wood

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Don't do drugs kids. There is a time and place for everything. It's called college. - South Park

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned: couldn't concentrate.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Divorce: When your wife stops screwing you, and her lawyer starts.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

I understand the concept of cooking and cleaning but not how it applies to me.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

I am not a morning person. By which I mean that in the morning, I am not a person.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

I'm glad I was diagnosed with OCD because now I have an even 100 problems.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

I wanted to kill the sexiest person alive...But suicide's a crime

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Sex can lead to nasty things like herpes, gonorrhea and somethin called relationships

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Sex on tv can't hurt unless you fall off.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer.

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Talking Ted @Talking_Ted

14 years ago

▒▒broke my tweet but ▒▒▒▒ a little duct tape goes▒▒ a long w▒ay....

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