Shitty Music Has Helped Moron Through Hardest Times In His Pointless Life bit.ly/4akGVQv
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@TheOnion e.g. how Shinedown got me through the eighth grade.
@TheOnion I thought we’d agreed there would be no more headlines about me
@TheOnion whatev fam, u do u tho. onion always savagen tho, gotta admit. music is subjective af tho, so keep boppin to whatever makes u happy
@TheOnion This headline personally attacked me, and I love it
@TheOnion Looks almost like my ex boyfriend.....so incredibly accurate lol