Jersey Fre$h @WordsWithT

"After yelling at United on the phone for an hour for losing my flight reservation, I remembered that I had booked my flight with Delta."

'Although the referee makes a valid point, we feel that this method is only something a dumbass would suggest' - Tim, being overly honest

"Oh man, we only have maker's mark, malibu, brandy, and gin left. This is a serious problem. We need to go liquor shopping right away" -Tim

Tim: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. *trying to remember something* KT: What? Tim: I forget.

I'm growing a playoff beard. Aka, I forgot shaving cream and don't know how to ask for it in Spanish. - Tim, talking about living in Mexico

Tim: I picked up some Spanish for buying stuff Andrew: I bet it's simple words like "pizza" or "coke" T: Hey, I also know "chips" and "agua"

Tim: I'm not driving home tonight, so I'm gonna put in a triple shot. Andrew: When do you ever drive? Tim: Fair point.

What kind of third world country doesn't have outlets but has wifi? - Tim, describing his bus trip to NJ.

"Can I even go to work today? What kind of patriot would I be if I went to work on Patriot's day?"

"So if you like it then you should put a bird on it?" Tim, when discussing bird paintings.

Tim: Oh, are you going to have amarillo? Armadillo? Andrew: You mean amaretto?

"It's not creepy because they are the same age as me now". When talking about watching old children movies.

"Oh my god. This hot dog is like... seizuring."

Maybe I'll go to work, if I'm not too lazy. Although, I didn't have breakfast this morning because I was too lazy to open up the cereal box.

*Opinion of his poor presentation*: 'People are going to be like 'Damn, Tim wrote this in an afternoon? Because that's what it looks like'.

Tim: Solving for X is just...algebra. Professor: Then just solve for it!

"I think it comes with a cooking book. It's like a cookbook, but better." Tim, describing his new crock pot.

KT: What IR bands are used for measuring extinction? Tim: Um, K? And I'm not sure, F maybe? Wait no, that's my grade on the exam tomorrow.

I am hungry. i.imgur.com/NIYZr.gif

Tim: What happened to the floor? Kt: I swept and mopped it. Tim: What happened to the table? It also looks strange. Kt: I cleaned it off.