Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

actor / comedian / list maker Joined September 2009

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Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

6 years ago

Victim: “My mother was murdered 25 years ago. The case went cold and her murderer is still free. Please, if you know anything, any help would be—“ Indiewire: “UGH, SO BOOOOOORING”

IndieWire @IndieWire

6 years ago

Netflix's #UnsolvedMysteries reboot is a underwhelming spin that loses the power of the original. @Journeys_Film reviews: bit.ly/2BrBp3V

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Chelsea Peretti @chelseaperetti

6 years ago

Heres my impression of fireworks

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Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

6 years ago

@ShimmeringMess

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Variety @Variety

6 years ago

"Cops" has officially been canceled by Paramount Network four days after it was pulled from the schedule wp.me/p2WgDE-1lynzf

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Blake Anderson @UncleBlazer

6 years ago

Can we install backboards on the ballot boxes this year because I want to dunk my vote against Trump so hard that I shatter that shit

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It’s weird to think that for future textbooks, this tragic period in time is probably the most well documented event in history. But purely in the form of memes and tiktoks. God, history books in the future are going to be so fun.

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Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

6 years ago

Last week a guy at work, totally unprompted said, “I went on a run this AM. I run every AM.” Later I asked what he was listening to & he said “Joe Rogan, he’s a genius, I’ll probably go on a run after work.”...I can’t stop thinking about it. was that code? Was he asking for help?

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Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

7 years ago

I love Musical theatre humor. I laughed real hard.

Rob McClure @RobMcClure

7 years ago

Episode 9. #conductorcam🎼 “Learning your lead has friends in the audience.” 🌟

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The Last Blockbuster @loneblockbuster

7 years ago

We're now offering rooftop pickup. Just shout which movie you want into the Quickdrop return slot and Danny will huck it off the roof.

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Sam Emaus @samuelemaus

7 years ago

me unmuting myself on the conference call for half a second to politely laugh at a joke

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Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

7 years ago

Ordering a lawn mower on the Internet feeling like a whole ass soccer dad named Clint. Feverishly adjusting my white tube socks in my matching white New Balances and making grunting noises every time I sit down or get up. Mansplaining football to my closeted son...This is the end

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Jennifer Wright @JenAshleyWright

7 years ago

This aged poorly.

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Matthew Rich @_Matthew_92

7 years ago

Being quarantined with 3 cats and a dog means you always have a cuddle buddy. It also means you always have an alarming amount of foreign hairs in your mouth.