Cory Stewart @_corystewart
🌈🐖 Sheffield, England Joined December 2010-
Tweets18K
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Followers4K
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Following4K
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Likes2K
Cory Stewart retweeted
just finished the last season of #DeadToMe I’m suing the producers for emotional damage like wtf I cried so hard judy and jen are fucking soulmates!!!
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Update: The mention of the word shit sent my bowels into panic. Thank FUCK that it’s only men who vacant the premises at 09:11. Thank you xx
About to shit myself but nowhere is open yet because it’s Sunday so I’m hovering outside Wetherspoons until I’m about to explode so I can run in quickly. Criminal to be in a Wetherspoons before 11:00, so I’ll just be here waiting xx Dying xx
That’s there’s no easy way to clean a cheese grater
You can only have a shit in the same coffee shop twice and then you must move on to a different one to continue the reign of terror. They’re the rules !! Currently looking for a second spot x
Cory Stewart retweeted
Time for dinner
Has there ever been a moment in time thus far that beats Gareth Gates overcoming his stutter on pop idol ?? because I truly don’t believe there is
Also why is Facebook so BLEAK. I want to live in dreamland please stop posting about reality !!!!
It’s 04:25 and I am craving a salt and vinegar crisp sarnie with Lurpak butter
I would choke myself with it
Is there anything more underwhelming than checking your LinkedIn notifications ??
Not to bring it up but I just remembered Matt Hancock’s fifty shades of grey moment and I feel queasy
Not trying to be negative but could you imagine having a child
Cory Stewart retweeted
thread of businesses i like but piss me off...
Was so drunk last night that my Face ID didn’t even recognise me
Why is finding cheap flights so fucking hard ??? Or am I just really poor ??
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