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Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

I'm him. This is real. anytown usa... Joined May 2010
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_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Yeah, see? I knew you would lose 'em. That's why I took 'em out of your dresser drawer and put 'em in my strongbox.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

See, you hate it that I have a little secret. Anything I do -- oooh, oooh! -- you gotta know everything about it. You're so obsessed with me.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Come on, this is a security issue. Boy, you wouldn't last a day in the Army.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Now, I gotta find a good place to hide this key. Because if somebody finds this, they hold the key to all my possessions.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

It's a strongbox to protect my irreplacables. Some taxidermy that's been in my family for generations. My Tony.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

To rule the people, one must walk among them.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Remember, ma'am, a vote for me, is a vote for Kramer.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Oh, I bought myself a little retirement gift. Gold watch. Well, it's not really gold. @summerpittman13

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Yeah, and you're not going to, because I'm hanging it up. Boys, I'm retiring.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Let's just say that I don't have to worry about working for a while.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Uh, you remember my coffee table book? That's the one. A big Hollywood so-and-so optioned it for a movie.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Well, grab a cigar, boys. Yeah. It's time to celebrate!

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Right. Yeah. The polls close after dinner, 3:00. But then when we win, the celebration goes all night until the break of 8:00pm.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

“Candidate Cosmo Kramer caught barefoot in clubhouse." ....Well, I couldn't find my shoes.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Cosmo Kramer. I'm running for condo president. I'd like your vote. Thanks.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Like the other night? I was cold. So, last night, I turn up the heat - it's too hot. I open up a window - it's too cold. I can't get into a zone!

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

My quilt is still at the cleaners. I can't sleep without my quilt.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

I take baths.

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Hey, what do you say if neither of us is married in ten years, we get hitched?

_cosmokramer_ Profile Picture

Cosmo Kramer @_cosmokramer_

7 years ago

Hey look, will you do me a favor? Will you take my quilt into the cleaners for me, so I can get the discount too?

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