j🦷 @_juliaeverett
professional curb hitter Joined April 2014-
Tweets2K
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Followers293
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Following297
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Likes9K
j🦷 retweeted
Apologies to the folks we used to judge for eating dinner at 6 and being in bed by 9. You guys were really on to something.
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j🦷 retweeted
being a woman is wild. i just cried, cleaned the house, had a snack, had a bath, & now i’m fine
j🦷 retweeted
[pulling out my phone mid conversation] hold on i have a list for this in my notes
j🦷 retweeted
ever since i was a little girl i wanted to retire
j🦷 retweeted
daily affirmations - i locked the front door - i locked my room door - i locked my car - i don’t have to go out and check if i locked my car - the light in my car is off - i don’t need to check if i hit the car next to me - the stove is off - the oven is off
j🦷 retweeted
there’s only 3 types of people who are never wrong: – Women – Oldest daughters – Firstborn granddaughters
j🦷 retweeted
the hottest a man has ever looked with a pencil mustache
the hottest a man has ever looked with a pencil mustache https://t.co/qw2mvuHOXp
j🦷 retweeted
I’d like to know
j🦷 retweeted
this is what it feels like when your joke bangs in the gc
this is what it feels like when your joke bangs in the gc
j🦷 retweeted
there’s a fat bunny in a stroller while im getting a pistachio matcha im so weak
playing sudoku daily pretending i work in MDR sorting numbers
j🦷 retweeted
you’re 25! you’re not running out of time! it has only just begun! except for me. i am 25 in a far more “it’s all over” way
j🦷 retweeted
accidentally had my jaw clenched for 6 hours again
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