Anders Pearce @anderspearce

@UtahEmergency With 2020 luck, I'm still packing my car with a 72-hour survival kit and putting it in my driveway. I don't trust that five percent as far as I can kick it.

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

@Purple Not #sleepstakes? 😉

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

@TheVulcanSalute Do you have any idea how loudly I screamed when I saw this? 😂🤣 You monstah!! Thanks for the #fanservice

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

@dominos Why is the slogan of your carry-out insurance program “That’s how the Dominos fall”? Warmest regards, A concerned copywriter

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

@mmschocolate I could and I shall, but this isn’t just about me. What about everyone else who needs the unexpected joy finding this magical combination at the checkout line would bring?

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

@mmschocolate When are you going to quit screwing around just give us the bag of Pretzel and Caramel M&Ms mixed up in the same bag? We’ve earned this.

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

@Dilee93 He was stressed...

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

As a society, I would like us to move on from "you're the bomb dot com" to "you're the shiz dot biz." Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

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Anders Pearce @anderspearce

7 years ago

You’re welcome, world. #tywinlannister #got #gameofthrones #pun #illseemyselfout

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Lagoon is extra fun with extra fun peoples 🙃 And with random strangers having existential crises in the background. #lagoon #itswhatfunis #lifeatpurple @ Lagoon Amusement Park instagram.com/p/By2-nMLBn0l/…