Cait🍕 @caitercait

How do I say, "I want someone who will let me eat them alive and give me everything I want." But in, like, an attractive way? Might have to chatGPT this 🤣🤣🤣

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I am around constant noise all day. Kids talking, kids calling my name, asking questions, the radio going off, staff talking to me, noise in the hallway, the fucking bathroom hand dryers, five kids asking questions at once surrounding me. I want some quiet when I get home.

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

Got a "that outfit looks good but it would look better on my floor." IS THE BAR REALLY THIS LOW

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

Saw a dude that has "entrepreneur at heart" wtf does that even mean??????

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

I'm rewatching season 18 of @BravoTopChef. I'm on the episode where they take indigenous ingredients and do a surf and turf dish. Watching the guests, in their regalia, talk about how they love each dish is making me emotional. You can see the happy in their eyes.

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

I hate the way you say my name / like it's something secret / my pen is the barrel of the gun / remind me what side you should be on

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

I am literally so bad at flirting WHY

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE A COMPLIMENT?????????? Or are you trying to impress me with your hunting prowess?? Guess what? Ya did neither, bitch.

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

Accidentally swiped right on a couple looking for a third. Please God, let them skip me 🤣🤣 WHY

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

I forgot Snapchat let's people know when you screenshot, even chats. So annoying.

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

Holy crap. I need a night out.

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

Why do so many dudes want to go hiking on a first date? That's how people get murdered. I'm not about to go off in the woods (period tbh) with some random ass man for a leisurely walk ALONE with no backup in case he's a creep. No.

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Cait🍕 @caitercait

2 years ago

Told my 5 year old niece I was looking for my Travis Kelce and she got a little irritated with me thinking I'm trying to break him and Taylor Swift up 🤣 had to explain I'm not trying to steal him 🤣🤣🤣🤣