I recall the 1st time I was given a 'He/Him' con tag. I was confused. "If someone doesn't have one, shouldn't you just... assume they are as they appear?" They explained it's not ABOUT me. It's about helping others who NEED to do it not feel like they stick out. Made sense.
I know some people like to sneer at it, like it's something you only do disingenuously - but it's such a small thing. So easy to overlook the usefulness if it's something you've never needed to worry about (like me)... but if it helps normalize the practice? What harm is there?
@davidgaider Somewhere lost in the cesspool of those replies there's some wankers telling me (and the non-binary person that was also involved) that marginalized people should just love themselves and not worry about solidarity and support like that....
@davidgaider My reasoning was the same as his. I want people who approach me to know I see them for who they are, I respect the pronouns they wish me to use and I feel like stating that in my profile is like candle in the window saying "Hey you, yeah you, you are safe here, you are seen"
@davidgaider I got kinda chewed out by an older female friend years ago for signing my name "Mrs" instead of "Ms" for much the same reason. We aren't less valuable if we aren't married and it makes the unmarried women stick out less if the marrieds use the same thing.
@davidgaider There is always The Qun solution. I’m going with “no pronouns” -just put an article in front of my name and call it a day. Only we should get to be called what we aspire to be instead of what we are... it would like the world constantly affirming the path you are on.
@davidgaider Some people have a weird disconnect re any consideration for others. What possible difference does it make to anyone, to not respect how someone else wants to be referred to? They'd prob never think twice if someone pref to be addressed by online/nickname, why are pronouns diff?
@davidgaider Ah, this makes sense. I never really thought about it, just noticed more people doing it lately. I'll make room in mine and add it.