Peter Depp @peterdepp

Human being. Father to other human beings. Infamous comedian. Always out in left field. peterdepp.com Nashville Joined January 2009

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

8 months ago

I wish Billie Jean would have taken Michael Jackson on Maury.

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

a year ago

The only time I’ve accidentally watched a Blake Lively movie was when I purposely watched an Anna Kendrick movie.

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

a year ago

Man! Lauryn Hill has canceled more concerts than Covid.

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

a year ago

Those who do not learn art history are doomed to misinterpret it. #OpeningCeremony

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Me: This is the best Father’s Day ever! Kids: Really Dad? Is it because all your kids and grandkids are all together in one place? Me: No. It’s because House of Dragon Season 2 premiers tonight. #HouseoftheDragon

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

a year ago

I was walking earlier today and there was this girl crying on some steps outside. She just found out she was pregnant. I did the right thing and wished her a Happy Mother's Day. #HappyMothersDay

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

2 years ago

I let my car self-drive us to church today. Talk about Jesus taking the wheel! #HappyEaster

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

2 years ago

Cashier: Big plans for Easter? Me: Oh you know just sitting around the house being Jewish.

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

2 years ago

I think we should remove the Presidential debate and replace it with each candidate being on an episode of Hot Ones. #hotones

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

2 years ago

I’m sorry but Lil Jon better be in the halftime show and better say “Yeah!” at least 45 times. #HalftimeShow

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

2 years ago

Is Beyoncé paying Blue Ivy to dance on tour or is it like when I tell my son to mow the lawn for free because I put a roof over his head? #BeyonceRenaissanceTour

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

2 years ago

Why do so many gay guys live in West Hollywood? Because WeHo’es! ….Ba-dum ching🥁 #jokes

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Peter Depp @peterdepp

3 years ago

I’m on team Gwyneth. My son only skied half a day once and I wanted to sue him for the rest of the money that I spent for the whole day. #GwenythPaltrowTrial