Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

My name is Bernard P. Milton Oliver Fife. I like to run a tight ship. Mayberry, NC Joined January 2017

Tweets

25
Followers

187
Following

1K
Likes

786

Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

I loves me some good taters

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

See, you've got a uvula, they've got a uvula, I got a uvula, all God's children got a uvula!

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Where there's smoke, there's firewater!

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

This is your subconscious. Come in, please.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Why don't we go up to the hospital some night and take the bolts off of the wheelchairs? That'd be funny, too.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Nip it! Nip it in the bud.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Next time I want a haircut, I'm gonna stick my head in a pencil sharpener.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

What is it with women. They got some kind of a rule they can't be happy unless they're causin' trouble?

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

The bigger they are, the nicer they are.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

It's me, Barney Fife!

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

I think it sure is just simply despicable how some people cannot recite the preamble. Despicable.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Neatness counts. Make order the order of the day.

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Who ever heard of a room you couldn't cook in? Six dollars a week, and what do I get? Heartaches, nothin' but heartaches!

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

Come on, everybody, let's all take a bite out of Barney Fife!

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

I don't know how I can face the future when I know there's eight quarts of these pickles in it

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

So, I say, when we die there should be two planets- one for the French and one for the Chinese

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

You better gird your loins buster

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

I ain't got time to stand around here and discuss trivial trivialities

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Barney Fife @pmiltonoliver

9 years ago

A winks as good as a nod to a blind mule

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