varanus @varanus

@tokentransfag The two worst therapists I ever had were both trans. Both tried to scam me out of money by lengthening the letter/approval process. I went to a gender clinic and got my shit done in a quarter of the time for half the price.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@hovermyr Jesus Christ, THANK YOU.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@polyanthems @grassfay I elaborated above. Established gender norms have absolutely no trouble with my current existence. That was not the case in my original form.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@grassfay @polyanthems How is it condescending? That was my goal, and for better or worse I seem to have achieved it. Like most long-term goals, it turned out to be more complicated than I had realized. Some people want to retain their difference; I was not one of those. Again, for better and worse.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@polyanthems What is currently in fashion. But I have no desire for whatever weird shit is going on in the transphobic Right.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@polyanthems I got way more threatening/threatened reactions to myself as a gendered being before transitioning than after. It’s actually something that troubles me sometimes because I do not actually support gender essentialism and rigidity. I may have different ideas about some things then.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@elotonvarvas @polyanthems That I show up being like, “we’re not special or different!” before diving back down my cys-identical rabbit hole. Well, that and the fact that I feel like (passing) trans men who deny male privilege are being gross.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@elotonvarvas @polyanthems I wasn’t expecting to lose a (vocal) minority of queer women, but now I know that they thought they saw something that wasn’t there: a difference in either nature or perspective beyond an accident of birth. Maybe it’s out of that experience

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@polyanthems And truly if I were interested in destabilizing gender/patriarchy, I probably would not have transitioned. I did so to become an ordinary man, and that’s what happened. I poke my head above water sometimes when I feel like people think my story doesn’t happen.

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varanus @varanus

2 years ago

@polyanthems I think my experiences differ in that I rarely encountered a lot of hostility irl from c’s people who weren’t super absorbed in gender studies. And I think a lot of the feeling of being hit from both sides goes away once you’ve lived as an ordinary man in the ordinary world.