Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

Pittsburgh-Based Stand Up Comedian. Hefty bag filled with sausage gravy. Facebook.com/brandonschellc… Pittsburgh, PA Joined August 2011

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 months ago

Sure guys, we bombed Iran, and that's terrible but the subsequent System of A Down album we'll get will slappppppp 🔥🔥🔥

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

11 months ago

I only fuck to Night Moves and I finish before the first chorus.

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The Worst Week Yet🇵🇸 @WorstWeekYet

2 years ago

FOLKS! Deanna’s in the desert this week so I had my pals @kayleigh_dumas and @BrandonJSchell join me to discuss yet another awful week! Worstweekyet.com

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

2 years ago

Gonna have a pretty regular amount of weed today, like a grown up.

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

Every time I hear the word hurricane, I instinctually react "I thought hurricane season was over"

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

2 Hocus 2 Pocus

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

Chocolate Starfish and The Hot Dog Flavored Water

Alonna Lee 🎃 @alonna_lee

3 years ago

Chocolate Starfish and The Hot Dog Flavored Water

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

Grits are undefeated in the streets. Have em sweet. Have em savory. Either way you're getting your dick knocked into the dirt. And when you're down there looking for your dick, it's gonna hit you again.

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

No one out Papa's the Roach

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

I got some skull candy earbuds today because 2005 is most rad

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

I'm your biggest fan. I'll follow you until you love me. Papa, Papa Roachie

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

Back the blue! You know, until they raid the Orange

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

I love seeing a dude in a $5000 suit that rides the bus. Like, fuck yeah king. Just because you ball out doesn't mean you can't reduce your carbon footprint.

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

Nobody out Papa's the John

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

ACAB includes Hall Monitors

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

I think pretty often about how much better this country would be if John Hinckley Jr was a better shot

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Brandon Schell @BrandonJSchell

3 years ago

I started working as a temp doing kitchen work at PNC Park recently. I was walking through the tunnels and I saw Steve Blass walking around in the Pirates Hawaiian Shirt, A Lei, and a Hula skirt. He sees me eyeing his drip, and says "Dementia" and walks away.