Cave Johnson @CaveJohnson
The name's Cave Johnson, founder and CEO of Aperture Science. I don't see crises - only challengitunities. aperture.online Aperture Science Joined August 2011-
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….I’m not saying these seem to share some… similarities to our patented Long Fall Boots™ That’s what we have the legal department for.
….I’m not saying these seem to share some… similarities to our patented Long Fall Boots™ That’s what we have the legal department for.
Hats.
[Seasonal_Pleasantries: Deployed] Santa’s still not real, but the boys in the lab say they’re getting ₜₕᵢₛ close to figuring it out. Maybe next year. 🧑🎄
Wouldn’t recommend inhaling the stuff, but it’s also a hell of an aphrodisiac. Do with that information what you will.
Wouldn’t recommend inhaling the stuff, but it’s also a hell of an aphrodisiac. Do with that information what you will.
Counter offer; I give you a bag of nickels* if you s̵u̵r̵v̵i̵v̵e̵ can escape our room. *ɴɪᴄᴋᴇʟs ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ sᴜᴘᴘʟɪᴇs ʟᴀsᴛ.
Counter offer; I give you a bag of nickels* if you s̵u̵r̵v̵i̵v̵e̵ can escape our room. *ɴɪᴄᴋᴇʟs ᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ sᴜᴘᴘʟɪᴇs ʟᴀsᴛ.
I’d say it’s worth it. However, the boys in legal tell me I have to label this as a joke.
Bad news everyone, we’re gonna need to make come cutbacks.
Bad news everyone, we’re gonna need to make come cutbacks.
At Aperture we fire the whole bullet, that’s 65% more bullet, per bullet.
Coming soon.
GET MAD CAT! MAKE LIFE TAKE THOSE LEMONS BACK! 🔥 🏠 ⬇️ 🍋
That gal sure sounds familiar.
A humble beginning.
No monkey has died as a result of our patented Aperture Science implant. First our early implants, to minimize risk to healthy monkeys, we chose terminal moneys (close to death already),
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wip! (Home top delegation is open) #Fursuit #furrycommission #Fursuitcommission #Fursuitmaker #Fursuiter
this is TF2 rn It really sucks that we are back right where we started after putting all our faith into them for almost 2 years. I really hope a change can be made. #SaveTF2
Would you spend 100 days in this room with a random stranger for $500,000? (Door is unlocked, if one of you leave before day 100 you both lose)
“This is the purest sample we've seen yet.” It's been 11 years since #BlackMesa went public! 🎉 To celebrate this milestone, we're offering a headcrabulous 80% discount on @Steam until September 25th. 🎮 Get to the facility without delay! bit.ly/BlackMesaSteam #Sale #Steam
This was absolutely amazing. John and Ellen Performed Still Alive live at "Meet The Mercs"!!
when life gives you lemons, craft a new lemon that shoots exploding lemons
thinking about how aperture science started out by selling shower curtains and asbestos
Happy 20th birthday to us! 🎂 And thank you to all of you - Steam would be nothing without you. In celebration, today we brought back the green, put together a little walk through memory lane, and have sticker gifts for all! Thank you again 💖 store.steampowered.com/sale/steam20
PbV here, Its about time I returned to this acccount (For real this time)
This is the most blatant bullshit lie I have ever seen on this site. GlaDOs' dialogue is half the fucking game of Portal, missing her is like missing that Mario has a mustache.
the way cis straight men play video games is infinitely fascinating to me. They just do not take in the story at all. I’ve had to explain bloodborne characters to men who say it’s their fave game. I talked abt Portal w a guy and said GLaDOS was my fave & he asked who that was.
"No one's going to miss a few astronauts, Mister Johnson..." "Hide the bodies, Mister Johnson..." [scenes/npc/glados/potatos_remembering_caroline06.vcd] [scenes/npc/glados/potatos_remembering_caroline05.vcd]
You know who’s fired if we don’t extend the event so he can get his DOTA 2 Ursa set? According to Gabe: us. So we’re happy and relieved to announce that the end date of the 10th Anniversary event is now September 18th. Please reply on this post with: THANKS GABEN #DOTA2
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@daily_sisyphus how did I not realise cave Johnson QRT'd just 10 ish minutes after I said this