Chris Moffit @DaAbstractChris

Joined January 2017

Tweets

379
Followers

69
Following

177
Likes

47K

Jane Coaston 🏔️ @janecoaston

a year ago

Be less weird about politicians! Don’t fall in love with politicians! Treat politicians like offensive coordinators, scream at them until they do what you want and berate their every mistake!

@ijbailey @ijbailey

a year ago

Be less weird about politicians! Don’t fall in love with politicians! Treat politicians like offensive coordinators, scream at them until they do what you want and berate their every mistake!

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Seattle Mariners - y @Mariners

a year ago

@Dbacks According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow,…

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Jaketropolis @jaketropolis

a year ago

do you think when Lightning McQueen threw the Piston cup to drive The King over the finish line a Honda Civic somewhere was destroying his living room after losing $10,000 on his parlay

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Stephen A Smith @stephenasmith

2 years ago

A live caller tried to get me with a Cars question…it didn't go well for him

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CBS Sports @CBSSports

2 years ago

Just gonna leave this here...

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San Francisco 49ers @49ers

2 years ago

Kicking off the #NFLDraft with a giveaway! RT for the chance to win a jersey signed by Christian McCaffrey, Fred Warner, Arik Armstead and Jake Brendel. No purchase necessary. Official rules: 49rs.co/3nfswlP.

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National Park Service @NatlParkService

3 years ago

If you come across a bear, never push a slower friend down…even if you feel the friendship has run its course.⁣⁣

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Seattle Mariners - y @Mariners

3 years ago

🚨 RT TO WIN 🚨 We’re kicking off our #STPrefunk by giving away a Spring Training replica jersey and cap from the @MarinersStore! Just hit that RT button for a shot to win.

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Evan Sowards @EvanSowards

3 years ago

Real 49ers fans aren’t upset because real 49ers fans are dead inside.

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Colin McCarthy @US_Stormwatch

3 years ago

California's Sierra Nevada range 80 days ago versus today. These mountains likely currently hold the biggest snowpack on the planet.

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Merriam-Webster @MerriamWebster

3 years ago

yips | noun | a state of nervous tension affecting an athlete in the performance of a crucial action

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Dan White @atdanwhite

3 years ago

The 19-year-olds who attend my favorite university didn’t score enough touchdowns today so I’m in the basement, drinking until I fall asleep. My wife is crying, begging me to come upstairs & watch a Muppet Christmas Carol with my family. “I don’t care if I die tonight” I whisper.

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Sickos Committee @SickosCommittee

3 years ago

Toledo mascot history is filled with some real horrors.

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Big Cat @BarstoolBigCat

3 years ago

We’ve finally made it. The best time of year. Merry #MACtion to all who celebrate.

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Pardon My Take @PardonMyTake

3 years ago

Maction

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Chris Biderman @ChrisBiderman

3 years ago

49ers now missing: -both starting tackles -both starting corners -three starting defensive linemen -starting safety -starting running back -starting quarterback -starting linebacker