Fesh Neer @FeshNeer
aiming to bring joy to your life through surrealism and oddity facebook.com/profile.php?id… Feshi Joined May 2011-
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If sticking a cocktail stirrer up your urethra for sexual pleasure... I can't stress this enough, double check, that it isn't made of glass.
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I'm so old, I remember when X Factor was just Roman sunscreen.
My wife said "I bet you can't go a whole day without telling a period joke." I said "You're on."
greggs sausage rolls making hoovers work overtime since 1990.
Read the dress code on funeral invitations very carefully. Sombre, whilst being only 2 letters away from sombrero, is a world apart in tone.
Fesh is fat, and tried to take a tip from smokers to stop cravings for chips. fesh is now Sellotaping a crisp to his arm each morning.
Necrophilia, lay back and crack open a cold one.
"Are you stalking me? Because that would be super!"
Fesher fools people into thinking that his father hails from Italy by walking around saying things like "Mama mia!…as my dad would say."
Feshy ConFESHion - 'No wank November' - fun while it lasted.
If you are invited to a 'London Underground Stations' party... Do NOT go as 'Cockfosters' Took me ages to get my dick back out of the can.
Pretend you're having sex by parking your car in a secluded country lane and steam up your windows using a 'travel kettle'
***tOUGH tIMES*** wHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MY PENIS AND A SPIDER? tHE SPIDER CAN MAKE MY GIRLFRIEND SCREAM :(
PROTIP OF THE DAY: Buy the wife some crotchless knickers for halloween, nothing sexual, just to give her a better grip on her broomstick.
Scared the postman today by going to the door naked. I'm not sure what scared him more, my nakedness or the fact that I knew where he lives
Fesh Neer retweeted
Morning Glonks Look at these incredible bargains Second hand flange nuts for sale.. auctions.preloved.co.uk/fuseaction-auc…
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