Fake Norm MacDonald @NormQuotes
Quotes, Videos, and More from the funniest man alive. You guessed it...Frank Stallone! Joined May 2012-
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I wanna tell every Dodgers fan that their team will be fine, but unfortunately I don't speak Spanish
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Has anyone ever bought you a lottery ticket for a present? That's like saying: "Here you go, NOTHING!!"
Why can't I have sex with a client? It's not like we're Psychiatrists, or, uh, Undertakers
According to the NTSB, sleepy truckers are responsible for 1,000 deaths a year. In second place? OJ Simpson at two deaths a year.
And at the end of ur life, I, u, that could add up to maybe like a thousand dollars, if u dont give, if u never give money to a homeless guy
Is anyone concerned that Jim Rome is burning?
If you want to be popular w/ the young kids at the malls, give em--give em free cigarettes. They think ur like the coolest guy in the world!
Note to @tbsveryfunny: Pick up this Norm MacDonald talk show bestweekever.tv/2012-05-16/nor…
Gary Busey left the hospital after overdosing on cocaine last Friday. Doctors say Busey is ok & he should be back in the hospital in no time
Ping pong is the only sport named after its inventor
Alright, fine, I'll go to jail. But let me tell you something young lady. You're gonna have to give me a few pointers on how to please a man
Fake Norm MacDonald retweeted
@NormQuotes Yes! haha and The Eric Clapton question.. "What a really uninteresting subject"
@CalanNelson I'm not gay, so I don't know much about Broadway musicals.
In a questionable move by the defense team this week, OJ Simpson demonstrated how to stab 2 people at the same time flic.kr/p/bXnM4Q
Scientists believe they've discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiters Europa. That primitive form of life? U guessed it, Frank Stallone
After reading all of these Yogi Berra quotes, I'm starting to think the guy was retarded #SportsShow #Yankees
Its been nice doin business w/ you. Now u probably wanna go home & kick back & enjoy a nice, tall, cold glass of chihuahua piss or something
Where have you gone Joe Dimaggio? Oh, that's right, you're dead
Hey, hey, easy with that, that's my lucky stabbing hat! #OJ
Uh, uh, ye yeh got any gum? HA HA HA HA! youtu.be/WyJ9iS8EQpE
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