Crap Jokes @TheCrapJoker
Good bad jokes taken from the net, friends, joke books, lolly sticks, christmas crackers, toilet walls and @keithchegwin Definitely not my own material. The School Playground Joined November 2014-
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I got caught smuggling twelve cases of Portuguese fortified wine in to the country.. Now I'm worried I might be de-ported.
Q) How do you stop moles from digging up your garden? A) Hide their spades.
I don't know why anyone would ever want a pocket calculator.. It's really easy to count how many pockets I've got.
The day I found my first grey hairs.. I thought I'd dye!
Apparently our local Police station has had it's toilet stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
Q) What do you call a man with a map on his head? A) Miles.
My younger Brother was named after my Father.. A bit confusing when your Brother is named Dad though.
Q) What did the Mexican say to his chicken? A) Oh-lay!
The kid next door has an imaginary drum kit, Can't beat that!
I couldn't decide wether or not to sell my bed.. So I slept on it!
Q) Who's in charge of the hankies? A) The handkerchief.
A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says, "Five beers please"
Knock, Knock Who's there? A Pile-Up A Pile-Up Who? Eeewww!
Q) What do you call an unmarried female moth? A) A myth.
I buy all my guns from a T-Rex. He's a small arms dealer.
My mate's just not the same since he almost drowned in a vat of lemon juice.. It's left him very bitter.
Did you hear about the poker player who lost his arm and got a prosthetic replacement? He's finding it hard to deal with.
Q) Why didn’t the lifeguard save the hippie? A) Because he was too far out!
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138K Followers 4K Following Entertainer/Presenter/Actor/Host I DO NOT HAVE AN AGENT Contact Me Direct: [email protected] https://t.co/9AzCGgshZz Gags - All Old & A Few New
@TheCrapJoker Yup, crap joke but this actually happened to me today!
@TheCrapJoker @TerryPancakes Keep them coming @TheCrapJoker you legend .Ignore the haters.Brightens up my day
@TheCrapJoker does that come with a mystery writer's block? xD @Ashley_SophiaIE
@TheCrapJoker @DebGreenwoodTV I'm writing a crime novel - well I had time to kill
@TheCrapJoker I had one published last year .....or did I?
@TheCrapJoker some crackers you just given me about a years worth of jokes to piss people off with now am on stitches laughing at these
@hawkstew @TheCrapJoker I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey (saying)
@TheCrapJoker I can keep a secret. It's the people I tell, who can't.
@TheCrapJoker @GaryMordey put some viagras in his eyes that made him look hard too @jhaig1977 @cheesey45
@jame7677 @TheCrapJoker just my sort of jokes! Thanks ;)
@TheCrapJoker @OCD_Nightmares oh the simple ones are the best 😆
@TheCrapJoker @ewatt_x this guy walked into a bar...... It was fucking sore
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