zedvanzed @Zedvanzed

He/Him Joined October 2018

Tweets

73
Followers

30
Following

837
Likes

99K

machine yearning engineer @confusionm8trix

9 months ago

hey so you’ve actually been putting it up your whole life! hope this helps!

Gram Smoker’s Dracula @chilledspectre

9 months ago

the concept of receiving hate mail from anton chigurh

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carl steezer @carlsteez

a year ago

@Jonny142000 @BarstoolBigCat If the Dodgers played the Taliban I’d be in the crowd wearing a burka

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no context memes @nocontextmemes

a year ago

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my two-year-old often asks me what strangers’ names are and i always make up something weird like Shubby or Bembo and apparently she’s been paying attention because we saw a deer on the way home and i heard her say quietly to herself in the back seat “i think his name is…Jimbus”

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meadowsweet @umbersorrow

a year ago

toddler sometimes refers to himself as a brother, like, "it's easy for a brother to do" (when cutting his own food) and, "it's not safe for a brother" (trying to get down from somewhere high up) and he sounds like a black guy from the seventies

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lou @wanlittlehusks

a year ago

Mom just referred to a couple visiting the bear exhibit at the zoo as “not here for the right reasons”

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rayne fisher-quann @raynefq

2 years ago

So easy to universalize personal experience into cultural critique .. just caught myself thinking “interesting how pumpkin carving is falling out of style” and then remembered im 23 and live alone in an apartment

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Stephen Gibbons @Gibboanxious

a year ago

I know everyone thinks his Glengarry Glen Ross scene is Alec Baldwin's finest acting performance, but this must be a close second.

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Claire Penis @ZeroSuitCamus

a year ago

To me there are two main Star Wars Texts: The wonderful series Andor, and The Book of Boba Fett, which is the worst television series ever made. Everything else, including the original series, is a spin-off of these two seismically important Intellectual Properties

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zupa grochowa @Grochowa2

2 years ago

lol she’s so done

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donald boat @laserboat999

2 years ago

Beer or shot? Solar and nuclear. You need a little bit of both, man.

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donald boat @laserboat999

2 years ago

JERRY: You were ripped apart by the jackals? GEORGE: I was torn asunder, Jerry. Torn asunder.

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zou bisou bisou where are you @lilgrapefruits

2 years ago

what a world this person lives in. no hate or fear, but no cheese either. i don’t know if i could make the switch

pestle @pestleee

2 years ago

why are fish the only thing you can monger. let me monger some other stuff

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Ron Iver @ronnui_

2 years ago

My least controversial opinion is that Ikea should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a gjörfbunkle

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John @JMN2323

2 years ago

At my cousin’s job, they do a white elephant where you have to buy a $20 gift for someone else One of her coworkers gave someone the rights to a printed out +8914 9-leg parlay Incredible move

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🟡 The tumboy 🟡 @TheTumboy

2 years ago

guy 1: There'll be parties for hosting guy 2: Marshmallows for toasting and caroling out in the snow guy 3 (has no idea what Christmas is): There'll be scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of Christmases long, long ago