chris horrax @chrishorrax

Music, biology, and comedy guy. Post your pets. Austin, TX Joined December 2010

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

3 years ago

Bat loose in the Chilis at 45th and Lamar @EvilMopacATX

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Life hack: if you get peanut butter on your hand you can wipe it off on your dog

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Thanksgiving is one of those weird daytime holidays where you pretty much wrap-it-up by 6pm and spend the rest of the evening wandering around your neighborhood feeling good and saying "hi" to your fellow food-drunks.

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Thom Thurkey

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Everyone keeps talkin bout The Monitor, and I guess it's apropos to the present political forecast in the good ol USA... but I'm diving in to TMLT tonight cuz it's my favorite and I miss you guys. Love you, tell RJ I lovem. @TitusAndronicus

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Shout out to @priyakrishna for making me aware of hing. Added some to the chili I've been making the same way for half a decade and it POPS!

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carl reiner @carlreiner

5 years ago

As I arose at 7:30 this morning, I was saddened to relive the day that led up to the election of a bankrupted and corrupt businessman who had no qualifications to be the leader of any country in the civilized world...

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Today I learned that John Wayne Gacy had a Diet Coke with his last meal. What a psycho.

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Just went 0 for 2 tossing my socks from the bed to the hamper, ruining my 18 day perfect streak.

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Aaron Rupar @atrupar

5 years ago

"Here's the bad part: When you do testing to that extent, you're gonna find more people, you're gonna find more cases. So I said to my people, 'slow the testing down please!'" -- Trump

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

How fucking dare you play @Neilyoung at a Trump rally

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

Remember the halcyon days of 4 months ago when the craziest thing to have happened in 2020 was Mr Peanut getting reincarnated because of the kool-aid man's tears, and then making dolphin noises?

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

I would describe it as restrained jubilation.

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

5 years ago

I don’t ever criticize peaceful protests, no matter my personal beliefs. But if the method by which you protest WILL endanger an exponentially larger group, it’s no longer a peaceful protest. #TogetherAtHome #COVID

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

6 years ago

Speedy Gonzalez had a cousin named Slowpoke Rodriguez who was slow but he could control minds and he also had a gun. Guess who got the top bunk?

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chris horrax @chrishorrax

6 years ago

The lord sayeth to fill thy children with alcohol and send them forth to shoot rockets into everything that they may kill 2019 and bring 2020 unto mankind