not liiners @notliiners
Joined February 2013-
Tweets1K
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Following451
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i support women’s wrongs
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please advise @CDCgov
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Me: don’t worry officer it’s medicinal Officer: sir that is a bottle of Tito’s Me: *lunges for his Glock 19*
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Depressed all by yourself beautiful?
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what do u mean my actions have consequences? I’m literally a girl
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All I want is a girl that will talk to me consistently when I’m ripped at 2am. Nothing more
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Ladies, you have been so amazing this week please take a prize:
When people come to my house and wonder why I only have an assortment of gas station snacks and half empty white claws
Preparing a meal is something only very boring millionaires should do. The ROI on preparing food is straight negative, for cucked males, who think being a "real man" is cooking to make up for the fact they have less than 300million dollars. Eat take out and work harder. Losers.
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Me: Sharks, you know how you always losing your hamburger? Mark Cuban: what? Me (holding a hamburger and looking around): “where my hamburger? Where my hamburger?” Daymond: Is he… supposed to- [the hamburger emits a deafening fire alarm noise] Me: well not anymore
@AlexMilne07 Jesus Christ I literally just saw this 🥹
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Russell Wilson: Let’s Ride The Ride:
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All this “Squirt is pee” “Squirt isn’t pee” discourse… Squirt is a caffeine-free, citrus-flavored, carbonated soft drink, created in 1938 in Phoenix, Arizona.
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Therapist: what do we say when our actions have upset someone? Me: Hoes mad Therapist: no
Me in every photo when I have a fresh set
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married to the game, i’ll never get a divorce
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