papa bear @pullsidepower
david. 6’4” 230ish. lefty. curly haired hater with a heater from the city of big shoulders poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine… Joined May 2020-
Tweets5K
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Likes36K
Your husband smacks your butt as you unplug the crock pot full of buffalo dip
It’s 2029. The AI bubble has burst. Your rent is $900 for a two bedroom. You bought a new high end graphics card for $125 because there are too many hitting the market. You’re living off the massive government settlement w/ai companies, spacex, amazon, and meta for price gouging
sorry can’t hear u over the sound of my cock and balls clapping
commercials during the MLB playoffs:
Life can’t just be weed and porn. You have to gamble too
@wtvrem13 we gotta teach you about the side street shortcuts 🤝
the Moon is moooooning tonight. go outside, friends! 🫂
Last week, friends with young kids came to visit us from the suburbs in California. As we ran around Manhattan together, they looked at us and asked, “How do you do this all the time? How do you raise young kids in New York City? Do you have to get in the car every time you go somewhere? This seems crazy.” I smiled and told them that, for us, raising kids in the city is actually easier than raising them in the suburbs. We never think about getting in the car. The grocery store is two blocks away. The kids’ doctor is two blocks away. There’s a Barnes & Noble six minutes away on foot. We walk to the Met, the Natural History Museum, and Central Park. We walk to get coffee. There are playgrounds and playdates everywhere. Our building is full of kids their age, and so is our block. Once you get past the idea that raising kids in the city must be complicated, the day-to-day reality is pretty simple. We just walk out the door. And honestly, raising kids in the city is actually a whole lot easier than raising them in the suburbs.
will u come back eventually
Your average Milwaukee couple
they’re calling it a beer sandwich! sláinte!
Turnstile at the Washington Monument today, a benefit show raising money for humanitarian aid in Palestine, Sudan, and Lebanon [📹: Ayman Abdeldayem]
they also taught us to take out backpacks off on public transit. some of you could learn a thing or two
DePaul, the largest Catholic university in the United States, requires each first year student to take a “Chicago Quarter” class In this class, students learn about the history, culture and sports of Chicago to introduce them to their new city 9 days till Big East basketball
bad day to be an Alley Beer in the country of Chicago (63° and sunny, go outside!)
I liked one horny tweet and now my timeline is filled with nsfw stuff. Call that goonscrolling
one of my biggest fears is living in the suburbs
How can you not be romantic about Chicago on a day like today (or any day)
if this doesn’t get here by 9pm today I’m gonna lose my shit
Dee @Roscoe36710133
35 Followers 428 Following
miss kelly @coolkidcort
1K Followers 1K Following there is so much to learn // writer & film critic, CFCA member // loves baseball
Vicker Park Vampiress @fionaapplescock
3K Followers 435 Following SATIRE. LA born, FL raised, Chicago living thanks to all things holy. venmo/paypal: @fionaapplescock cashapp: $fionaapplescock
kimberly @88slimee
27K Followers 1K Following 24 🇲🇽|#Herewego|#MostHated|ONLY ACCOUNT! no insta etc |#KIMPIRE|
Sophia @KCvQxs3xnDM5lQE
0 Followers 275 Following grad school survivor ☕ powered by caffeine, deadlines & compliments from strangers on the internet
colin @bonyromo
1K Followers 630 Following
M🐘 ⁷ but spooky @meaghancates
9K Followers 2K Following Like the Dude, but smaller/ likes hockey more than you/ ♊️ 🥍/ optimistic Detroit Tigers fan / #lgrw / $10 dm fee
moderately amusing ga... @ModeratelyMused
11K Followers 3K Following chronically unserious, emotionally impervious
gov name @_putsomeiceonit
532 Followers 523 Following Red Head. Multi-sport Athlete. Tequila Connoisseur. Retired Lax Bro Recruiter. Financial Freedom Enthusiast. Quad Appreciator
Fleet @Fleetwood_Smack
587 Followers 927 Following 2026 Haterade Playa hater of the year. a little lad who loves berries and cream. Retired Bottle Girl
lil pharma 🎃 @magselizabethx
3K Followers 782 Following certified idiot doctor. diet pepsi addict. shit talker. venmo&cashapp: magselizabeth
𝐻𝒶𝓃𝓃𝒶�... @HannaFunnah
431 Followers 2K Following i fear i was meant to be a rich stay at home daughter ♡
skylar white, yo @litlegreenghoul
2K Followers 352 Following she/her, 27 horror books & movies. pokémon & puzzles CR: Killing the Boogeyman - Richard Chizmar 24/52
for @machinegunluff
175 Followers 628 Following
sliving2025 @slivlaughlove
449 Followers 458 Following now watch this drive • weaknesses include dark ghost and bug
discohausbunny @discohausbunny
568 Followers 564 Following Cute enough for the disco, unhinged enough for the afters 🪩
The Electric Duckie @ElectricDuckie
383 Followers 269 Following duckie that loves house and sprouting 🎶🌱🍬🪩🇨🇺
Ousjohn @Ousjohnd
187 Followers 7K Following Philippians 4:13 - "I can do all things through him who strengthens me. ❤️☦️
K, MBA @urfavSpecialK
2K Followers 969 Following horny for house music among other things | Midwest princess | Jorts advocate | certified lovebug
g @gabb_riii
10K Followers 2K Following
P@blo @EscobumpGaviria
2K Followers 2K Following bedroom dj. tattoo, techno, & tequila enthusiast. LOTR fan, gamer, night owl. i tweet music & nonsense. 🐸💚
baby bell 🦋 @bellasdaze
13K Followers 2K Following 28. creative. (bi)-coastal. the internet's fav sour patch kid. not a spicy cc. venezuelan. sleepy stardust & a lotta love. tpa. hockey.🤍 backup: @bellasdaze2
chloe @cryingseIfie
3K Followers 2K Following
Valerie “Big V” S... @g01den_Grl
1K Followers 782 Following worlds worst ex girlfriend | hoosiers | elizabeth holmes sympathizer
claire of the dog @luckygrl420
1K Followers 331 Following tummy full of edible gummy's i'm feeling yummy 🇮🇪🇮🇹🦂🩰
miss kelly @coolkidcort
1K Followers 1K Following there is so much to learn // writer & film critic, CFCA member // loves baseball
Vicker Park Vampiress @fionaapplescock
3K Followers 435 Following SATIRE. LA born, FL raised, Chicago living thanks to all things holy. venmo/paypal: @fionaapplescock cashapp: $fionaapplescock
colin @bonyromo
1K Followers 630 Following
ℯ @wontbeurdrug
4K Followers 535 Following
𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭... @keliscope
4K Followers 854 Following kaleidoscope of my hobbies and hyperfixations 🪲🔮 knicks ❤︎ yankees ❤︎ patriots $keliscope priv: @notkellytho
kendall 🏆 @kendelliott
6K Followers 1K Following IU grad. Pre-Cignetti IUFB season ticket holder. College Football fan. Real Estate Enthusiast. #Neverdaunted #Fortheshoe #Yescers
Fleet @Fleetwood_Smack
587 Followers 927 Following 2026 Haterade Playa hater of the year. a little lad who loves berries and cream. Retired Bottle Girl
skylar white, yo @litlegreenghoul
2K Followers 352 Following she/her, 27 horror books & movies. pokémon & puzzles CR: Killing the Boogeyman - Richard Chizmar 24/52
dick van yikes🤠 @richardvanyikes
7K Followers 645 Following ⓘthis user is in an abusive relationship with the Chicago Blackhawks | Helen Keller denier. | the wicked witch of the east, bro.
afters angel 🪩🪽... @burnerc1ty
2K Followers 443 Following mostly a concept ⁎⁺˳✧༚ | selfish brat ♌️ | feminist 🌈 | 27
tay @t_rockk23
7K Followers 1K Following the roof is not my son, but I will raise it #NEPats #IUHoosiers insta/tiktok: @t_rockk23 IU Alum
Chandos @ZDChandos
112 Followers 799 Following friends, gym, sports, music, and general stream of consciousnes
Jordan @jordancicchelli
50K Followers 4K Following what do you know about the legend of Derek Dietrich?!
jane jets @janeejetsonn
1K Followers 41 Following
discohausbunny @discohausbunny
568 Followers 564 Following Cute enough for the disco, unhinged enough for the afters 🪩
super weenie hut jr�... @suction4IDs
425 Followers 351 Following house & techno slut, looking for a hotdog
lizzie “last call�... @buffsandregrets
763 Followers 200 Following ΦΜ pres | CU Boulder class of 98’ | bag enthusiast | ΣΝ terrorizer | colorado avalanche trash | fatphobic | ball knower | amy dunne did nothing wrong #skobuffsYou might like
