ruby @selfhat_ed
24 | shtwt š«¶š» | BPD instagram.com/selfhat.ed?igsā¦ She/they | fatphobics dni Joined January 2023-
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Cut again. Also I cant go deep on my thighs it hurts so bad how do yāall even do it š. I miss slicing up my arms.
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Tiny cut, to hide under my Apple Watch. Cant wait for it to get cold.
Ended up cutting again, really lame small cuts cause itās still 90 - 100 degrees š
My mom told me Iām useless over something so stupid and it triggered me so bad I almost told her how sheās actually more useless but I held back and decided to cry and cut about it instead.
On a happier note Iām 30 days clean, but school is about to start soon so Iām a bit scared for the stress of it all.
Fucked up like 60 days clean. But whatever.
Iām so upset, Iām so stupid. I always give so much. I just realized how much Iāve done. I hate myself.
Iām starting to feel awful, I donāt want to go to work tomorrow. I want to disappear
I saw a new psychiatrist today, he seems nice. I hope I donāt scare him off with my suicidal thoughts. I also feel like my therapist doesnāt give a fuck if I die or not and itās such a weird feeling. Makes me not care if I attempt again.
I want to cut again so bad but itās been 42 days since I last did it.
Every single time I make new friends I end up getting hurt. And I tried not to overthink this but itās hard when Iām clearly the problem.
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