spook @spookitheboy

Just here to look around thanks. he/him open.spotify.com/album/1jZ4kfQ0… Provo, UT Joined January 2013

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4K
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173
Following

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SENATOR FROM GEORGIA: does TikTok use Bluetooth to give elderly southern men gay thoughts? TIKTOK CEO: out app cannot do that SENATOR: your app cannot cause the user to pine for heartbreaking, lithe twinks with hungry holes? TIKTOK CEO: no. SENATOR: I find that hard to believe.

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wint @dril

14 years ago

IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL

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eddie pepitone @eddiepepitone

3 years ago

You’ve hit bottom. You’ve tried Pilates. You joined a book club. You joined a hate group. You micro-dosed LSD. You took cold plunges. You read Truman Capotes IN COLD BLOOD. You cut out sugar. Isn’t it time you drove a Ford? Ford. It’s almost over.

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WH @hastifliche

3 years ago

my grandma: oh you're so handsome and tall now but i remember when you were barely knee-height, with those big chubby cheeks 😊 me [drawing my sword]: You forget yourself, crone.

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spook @spookitheboy

3 years ago

My brain is just “Angela Bassett did the thing” over and over and over. It’s been 2 days. I’m going to explode.

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spook @spookitheboy

3 years ago

I had this one

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spook @spookitheboy

3 years ago

when she says motherfucker I get chills

matt @mattxiv

3 years ago

when she says motherfucker I get chills

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no context memes @weirddalle

3 years ago

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bug @augerbug

3 years ago

this is what ai voice generation is meant to be

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Dr. Rich Beef PhD 🇵🇸 @MildCuthbert

3 years ago

Hey man my late wife really hated your anecdotes. She called them blurry facsimiles of human experience, cheap postcard reproductions of a life lived poorly. She often said the endings of your stories landed like dead pigeons falling from the sky. She said she wouldn't miss them.