Stephen @steamoe
Central California wedding and family photographer. stephenbryantphoto.com Fresno, CA Joined December 2008-
Tweets1K
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Followers73
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Following52
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Likes8
FACT: every Starbucks has “their people”who go in. I just figured out what people go in to the one I frequent… bald.
2 jobs I wish I had. 1) drinking coffee and hanging out. 2) observing 1st dates. Sometimes the 2nd happens during the 1st.
Are you even a husband if you don’t bring all the groceries inside in one trip?
Sometimes it’s spend way too much time formulating my tweets only to never tweet them.
When I find a hair in my food I’d like to think it were a female’s, just because I think they’re cleaner than males… even though I know females don’t wash their hair as much as males.
I dont know if Ive said this publicly but if you’re a people watcher you know the worse thing is to make eye contact with the people you’re watching. Well 2022 is the year I stop. If you catch me in 2022 & we make eye contact, you better believe I’m acknowledging the eye contact
Listen, I just want all the chocolate chip cookies... hold the chocolate chips
Everyday I am more and more convinced my speedometer is wrong... no way this many people should be passing me while driving!
Dude! The mechanics of your eyes are truly amazing! The mechanics of sight.... *explosion* mind blowing!
It may be 2020, but I can still watch The Greatest Showman everyday!
Mark this date in history as the first time doing laundry and finding a match for every single pair of socks! Looks like 2020 isn’t that bad.
Being a parent means never pooping alone again...
Catching strangers fart in public is probably one of the funniest things! Tell me I’m wrong!
If I have one talent it’s going up to people I don’t know... thinking I know them... to find out I don’t know them...
You know what’s so hard... not turning away when you accidentally make eye contact with someone across the room! I say no more... I’m keeping eye contact until the awkward meter explodes!
So weird. I’m in Starbucks and it smells like pure dog farts.
You know what gives anxiety... waiting to sit down with the barber.
The best Christian pick up line... “so you wanna start a bible study... just me and you?”
“It’s not louder enough...” a proud moment to hear my son say those words :)
Sometimes when you yell “HEY!” At someone, you just have to own it and say, “I don’t know you I’m just saying ‘hey’”
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