Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

apparently Twitter’s still relevant, so here I am Newport Beach, CA Joined May 2011

Tweets

490
Followers

93
Following

289
Likes

767

Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

I love when peoples dogs run up to you and they say “I’m so sorry” as if the dog giving me attention didn’t make my entire night

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

What is wrong with our world. We need healing.

Gaza Now in English @EnglishGaza

2 years ago

What is wrong with our world. We need healing.

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special shout-out to the tech that played gospel throughout my appointment… nothing like hearing “we love you god, we love you jesus” while getting a 15 minute-long transvaginal ultrasound with your feet in stirrups

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

does anyone else hear the TikTok text-to-speech voice and get physically & emotionally upset or do I just have sensory issues

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

me: I’m having an existential crisis mom: legs are hairy right now… we all have problems

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

me: “I’m trying to focus more on…” my 14 year old sister: “…your appearance?”

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

do you sit in your car crying for 15-30 minutes when you first get home or are you mentally stable

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

You know your job requires way too much travel time when you listen to several podcasts that air almost every day of the week yet you still run out of things to listen to every day by 5pm.

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

*goes to the eras tour once and now listens to @taylorswift13 in cold showers in the dark*

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

you haven’t seen ridiculous celebrity privilege until you’ve seen kim open the dmv early, have a glam squad, add additional lighting, and be granted retakes for her license photo until satisfied on the newest kuwtk

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

who tf is matt rife

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

My Twitter worth is: $340.00 ➡️

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Tori Schmidt @t_t_t_torrence5

2 years ago

my 14 year old sister just told me about a dress she bought that would be ‘cute for festivals’ and then said: “well— it’s probably a little too family friendly for YOU to wear to festivals” — and I’m not sure if I feel seen or disrespected.