Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

Status updates so mundane, they’ll make your life feel like a rollercoaster of discovery. Make sure you check your smoke detector battery. Joined April 2023

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

7 months ago

I have officially switched from iPhone to android. I'm still uncertain how I found the X app, but here we are! Can't get back to the home menu, but at least yall are cool to hang out with.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

7 months ago

I want to start a women’s dress line called “Pockets” which will feature pockets on every dress. Women will love it.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

7 months ago

Photo from last summer’s family reunion. I’m not in it because I was taking the picture. I always get asked to take the picture for some reason.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

7 months ago

Good morning! I’m making coffee if anyone wants some. You’ll have to bring your own sweetener and I only have 2% lactose-free milk.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

7 months ago

My 10-year-old nephew told me out of the blue today that I smelled like pancakes and, honestly, I think that’s the best compliment I’ve ever received.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

7 months ago

I actually dreamt last night about me and a group of people I’d just met complaining about season 8 of “Game of Thrones.” So, I’m clearly still holding on to that. 😂

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

8 months ago

Happy Valentines to all who celebrate. ♥️ Happy just another lonely Friday to those who don’t. 🍷

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

8 months ago

My cousin, who is a peacock (long story), told me my life might be less boring if I added a little color to my wardrobe. I got this on sale at Goodwill. What do y’all think? Not sure I’m feeling it.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

8 months ago

I know there’s a lot of things going on in the world right now, but I want y’all to know I finally splurged on a toaster so I’ll no longer have to warm my bread in a frying pan like a cave bird.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

8 months ago

Awoke this morning to discover my neighborhood shrouded in a heavy fog, which naturally means this’ll be my mood all day

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

8 months ago

The good news is, no matter who wins the Super Bowl tonight, we all still get to come home and bask in the warm glow of the Christmas trees we still haven’t taken down. And by “we all” I mean “me”. I still need to take down my Christmas decorations.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

8 months ago

I’ve decided to reinstate my addiction to Candy Crush until further notice.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

11 months ago

Trump just appointed the first female White House chief of staff in American history. So, are we still doing that Handmaid’s Tale thing y’all keep talking about? When does the FBI need my bonnet size? 😂

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

11 months ago

Guys, look. Just because I’ve no sense of direction doesn’t me I’ve no worth as a person. I mean, just not unless you wanna get somewhere safely or on time.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

a year ago

I don’t wanna work anymore. I just wanna find myself staying in an old, Victorian mansion on a misty moor where I can spend my days exploring hidden rooms and slowly unraveling a sordid family history that lead to murder.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

a year ago

Just learned some media personalities have recently said loving “The Lord of the Rings” now indicates you’re alt-right. I have an entire Tolkien section of my at-home library. No one tell the FBI. 😂😂

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

a year ago

I’m at the point where if you use a word ending in -ism or -obia without a VERY convincing set of evidence, I automatically think you’re stupid.

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

a year ago

Looking forward to the #Eclipse2024 today. I hope we get the Marshmallow Man over zombies or vampires, but I guess any apocalypse will get me out of work for a few hours, so …

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Basic Boring Bird @BasicBoringBird

2 years ago

I’ve decided I just wanna be a pirate. Not like the ruthless real-life pirates. No, I just wanna sail around, do some light thieving, maybe run out on a few meal checks, and take down an oppressive government regime or two as the occasion arises.