Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

Ex-Dad. Proud Community Servant of the Church of the Story. One Story one Truth. I've lived many lives and they've all been pretty bad. thestorymustbetold.com The Story Joined November 2018

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

ok this has been fun! Thanks for bearing with me, at times. I killed john f kennedy and I’d do it again! (poof!)

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

I don’t “dump” technically what I do is called a “shove” so it wasn’t me

The Story Must Be Told @TSMBTpod

3 years ago

I don’t “dump” technically what I do is called a “shove” so it wasn’t me

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

Truly love when airports get updated and then they make signs about it that say shit like LAX GOT A FACELIFT 😜 and FRESH NEW TITS, SAME OLD DALLAS

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

opened an Uncle Anne’s in the mall and we serve pretzels that are so hard they’ll break your fuckin teeth

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

this 👏 is 👏 why 👏 voting 👏matters

New York Post @nypost

3 years ago

this 👏 is 👏 why 👏 voting 👏matters

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

when someone asks me if I've heard of a new restaurant

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(on my death bed, my family around me, thinking if I look long enough I’ll remember. I know that’s not true. Darkness comes. It’s warm. The beeping intensifies. I have time to say one more thing - one more I love you as I straddle both worlds) “That’s it. That’s the tweet.”

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

thought this was mcdonalds finally giving us hotdogs

Nasir Jones @Nas

3 years ago

thought this was mcdonalds finally giving us hotdogs

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

just got a job at the bottled water factory filling each bottle up to the brim

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

bank? no sir ain’t no bank here just me and my my uh my cargo I’m a cargo guy so I’ve never defrauded anyone

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Pastor Andrew @PstrAndrew

3 years ago

When I lived in Sacramento I watched Santa Claus pull a bank teller into the street by his hair and shoot him in the head.

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

(on trial in new york) your honor my client would like to keep it a bean for a sec (attorney-client whispering) so your honor if we're being real, he actually did chop up his landlord into little pieces

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

you’re telling me that in the 1970s a bunch of teachers and parents and classmates knew a little boy named ~Paul Hollywood~ and were just like yeah ok that’s fine ???????????????

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MJ Knefel @mollyknefel

3 years ago

Some professional news: the podcast I co-created + co-host with @jacktheworm & @holdenators is going on a national tour and tickets are on sale TODAY! We are a pop culture/celebrity gossip podcast/slumber party everyone is invited to. Come see us! bigjackie.com/pages/page-7

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

AMERICANS ARE… _ humping the pump _ pumpin some grumps _ chumpin their dumps X paying at the pump

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Devon Harris @DevonTSMBT

3 years ago

why

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Last Podcast Network @LastPodNetwork

3 years ago

New @TSMBTpod episode featuring GUEST PREACHER @MarcusParks awaits thee in thine preferred method of listening. Listen and learn about a wonderful tale of brain death! Hear Marcus do a questionable british accent! listen.stitcher.com/yvap/?af_dp=st…